Are you using 2 sticks of RAM or just 1x4GB? If it's 2, then put one single stick of RAM into the board and read the memory amount in the BIOS. Do this again in another slot, until you've put that stick in all four slots. Then repeat with the other stick of RAM. If any of the slots are bad, or a stick of RAM is bad, this should tell you. If it's 2x2GB and you can only read 2GB it really does sound like a bad stick of RAM.
If it's 1x4GB, you said you've already used it in all four slots so it sounds like bad RAM to me, or a BIOS/motherboard issue.
Try checking the memory with Memtest86+ or Windows' memory checker (which I believe is included with their repair disk which you can burn from Windows 7).