Ah, figured it out after a little tweaking. Apparently the new 2016 edition of Panda Security likes to literally run 2 separate processes that each take 25% of CPU resources.... (The 2015 edition is great and if you can find the download, grab it). Sorry for being so vague about my question. For people also experiencing this problem and have Panda, check the resource monitor under the performance tab in task manager. If your PSUMain.exe and another process are big resource consumers, just uninstall it. I grabbed Avast! and now my explorer is back to opening instantly with my only about 25% usage. I'm gonna give to best question to unreal just for answering. Cheers!