I Hate Steam Because....

[nick]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

1. It makes chipboard swell up, damaging the laminate of "quality" kitchen
units.

2. It makes me blind when I get on a bus on a cold day and my glasses
instantly cloud over.

3. Super-heated Steam really gets up my nose. And I've heard that it can cut
you in half without you even seeing it. Now THAT's a bastard.

4. It's sort of like Stream but spelled wrong.

5. It was replaced by the petrol engine, which, like, totally roolz, and
causes WAY more polution.

6. It's generally confused with water-vapour, and yet it has never made any
effort to address this popular misconception.

7. Yeah, that's right, it's actually INVISIBLE. I hate it because I want to
be invisible too. And I can't. As far as I know. Call it jealousy. I have
green eyes. Whatever.














Wow. I think the coffee made me write that. So, kids, you see what coffee
can do to you? A lesson for us all, I think.

 

[Guest]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

Nick wrote:
> Wow. I think the coffee made me write that. So, kids, you see what
coffee
> can do to you? A lesson for us all, I think.

Ironically, steam is one thing you don't want near your coffee. if you
make coffee with boiling water (and therefoer steam) it will burn the
coffee and give it a bitter taste. You should always use water just off
the boil.

 

[Guest]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

Andrew wrote:
> On 18 Feb 2005 02:24:24 -0800, "Chadwick" <chadwick110@hotmail.com>
> wrote:
>
> >Ironically, steam is one thing you don't want near your coffee. if
you
> >make coffee with boiling water (and therefoer steam) it will burn
the
> >coffee and give it a bitter taste. You should always use water just
off
> >the boil.
>
> You have never had a cappuccino then?


Erm... Can I hide behind semantics, and claim that if you order
"coffee" (or "coorrfee" if you're John Travolta in Saturday Night
Fever) in a restaurant, you will get a different drink than if you
order a "cappuccino"?

Also, just be clarify, is just the milk that is steamed and frothy, or
the coffee as well?

Whilst on the subject, I have a suspicion that an Espresso may involve
steam. Any experts in the house?

 

[Guest]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

Nick wrote:
> In fact, every morning, as I fall from my bed, I chant my little
mantra -
> "Water boiled, Coffee Spoiled". And then I have a cup of tea instead,

> because I can't afford to risk an accident.

Oh! And it was going so well!

You see, tea really does need boiling water. It releases the tanins.
That's why machines can't make tea - because they rarely boil the
water. You also need to get the teabag out again pretty pronto else it
goes bitter.

And yes, it does make a difference if you put the milk in first. Don't
even go there.

 

[Andrew]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

On 18 Feb 2005 02:24:24 -0800, "Chadwick" <chadwick110@hotmail.com>
wrote:

>Ironically, steam is one thing you don't want near your coffee. if you
>make coffee with boiling water (and therefoer steam) it will burn the
>coffee and give it a bitter taste. You should always use water just off
>the boil.

You have never had a cappuccino then?
--
Andrew, contact via interpleb.blogspot.com
Help make Usenet a better place: English is read downwards,
please don't top post. Trim replies to quote only relevant text.
Check groups.google.com before asking an obvious question.

 

[nick]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

"Chadwick" <chadwick110@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1108722264.945894.252520@l41g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
>
> Nick wrote:
>> Wow. I think the coffee made me write that. So, kids, you see what
> coffee
>> can do to you? A lesson for us all, I think.
>
> Ironically, steam is one thing you don't want near your coffee. if you
> make coffee with boiling water (and therefoer steam) it will burn the
> coffee and give it a bitter taste. You should always use water just off
> the boil.

I do, I do, I promise I do. You think that I, who hate Steam so much, would
put any near my precious instant?

;o)

 

[nick]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

"Chadwick" <chadwick110@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1108725517.238054.301030@l41g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
>
> Andrew wrote:
>> On 18 Feb 2005 02:24:24 -0800, "Chadwick" <chadwick110@hotmail.com>
>> wrote:
>>
>> >Ironically, steam is one thing you don't want near your coffee. if
> you
>> >make coffee with boiling water (and therefoer steam) it will burn
> the
>> >coffee and give it a bitter taste. You should always use water just
> off
>> >the boil.
>>
>> You have never had a cappuccino then?
>
>
> Erm... Can I hide behind semantics, and claim that if you order
> "coffee" (or "coorrfee" if you're John Travolta in Saturday Night
> Fever) in a restaurant, you will get a different drink than if you
> order a "cappuccino"?
>
> Also, just be clarify, is just the milk that is steamed and frothy, or
> the coffee as well?
>
> Whilst on the subject, I have a suspicion that an Espresso may involve
> steam. Any experts in the house?

No, but I had an espresso once. It was nice, but I hadn't had any breakfast,
and it made me feel dizzy. Some say I never recovered...

 

[nick]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

"Nick" <nick@yourstuff.com> wrote in message
news:1108728045.21030.0@sabbath.news.uk.clara.net...
> "Chadwick" <chadwick110@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> news:1108722264.945894.252520@l41g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
>>
>> Nick wrote:
>>> Wow. I think the coffee made me write that. So, kids, you see what
>> coffee
>>> can do to you? A lesson for us all, I think.
>>
>> Ironically, steam is one thing you don't want near your coffee. if you
>> make coffee with boiling water (and therefoer steam) it will burn the
>> coffee and give it a bitter taste. You should always use water just off
>> the boil.
>
> I do, I do, I promise I do. You think that I, who hate Steam so much,
> would put any near my precious instant?
>
> ;o)

In fact, every morning, as I fall from my bed, I chant my little mantra -
"Water boiled, Coffee Spoiled". And then I have a cup of tea instead,
because I can't afford to risk an accident.

 

[Guest]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

"Chadwick" wrote

> Erm... Can I hide behind semantics, and claim that if you order
> "coffee" (or "coorrfee" if you're John Travolta in Saturday Night
> Fever) in a restaurant, you will get a different drink than if you
> order a "cappuccino"?
>
No need to as Cappuccino has more in common with Expresso than with coffee

> Also, just be clarify, is just the milk that is steamed and frothy, or
> the coffee as well?

Milk only
>
> Whilst on the subject, I have a suspicion that an Espresso may involve
> steam. Any experts in the house?
>
Not an expert on the matters - but Google to the rescue ...

"The basic principles are to extract only the *best part*, using water which
is *not quite boiling* and under *a lot of pressure*. The "best part" and
"not quite boiling" bits are critical to making good coffee by any means,
while "a lot of pressure" is a neat trick to manage at the same time. "

http://www.math.columbia.edu/~bayer/coffee.html

- Peter

 

[nick]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

"Peter Lykkegaard" <polonline@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:37m1hkF5gqkuhU1@individual.net...
> "Chadwick" wrote
>
>> Erm... Can I hide behind semantics, and claim that if you order
>> "coffee" (or "coorrfee" if you're John Travolta in Saturday Night
>> Fever) in a restaurant, you will get a different drink than if you
>> order a "cappuccino"?
>>
> No need to as Cappuccino has more in common with Expresso than with coffee
>
>> Also, just be clarify, is just the milk that is steamed and frothy, or
>> the coffee as well?
>
> Milk only
>>
>> Whilst on the subject, I have a suspicion that an Espresso may involve
>> steam. Any experts in the house?
>>
> Not an expert on the matters - but Google to the rescue ...
>
> "The basic principles are to extract only the *best part*, using water
> which is *not quite boiling* and under *a lot of pressure*. The "best
> part" and "not quite boiling" bits are critical to making good coffee by
> any means, while "a lot of pressure" is a neat trick to manage at the same
> time. "
>
> http://www.math.columbia.edu/~bayer/coffee.html

Ah, so it's just high-pressure water-vapour, and not that evil steam stuff
then? Well, that's ok. I'll get my espresso/cappuccino machine back out of
the rubbish bin.

 

[Guest]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

> Erm... Can I hide behind semantics

PC Anywhere?

 

[john]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

Chadwick wrote:
> Nick wrote:
>
>>In fact, every morning, as I fall from my bed, I chant my little
>
> mantra -
>
>>"Water boiled, Coffee Spoiled". And then I have a cup of tea instead,
>
>
>>because I can't afford to risk an accident.
>
>
> Oh! And it was going so well!
>
> You see, tea really does need boiling water. It releases the tanins.
> That's why machines can't make tea - because they rarely boil the
> water. You also need to get the teabag out again pretty pronto else it
> goes bitter.
>
> And yes, it does make a difference if you put the milk in first. Don't
> even go there.
>
Down here in Texas we make sun tea. Tea bags in a big jar of water
setting in the sun on a nice hot summer day. Served over ice. Yummy! And
no evil Steam ;-)

 

[nick]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

"jOhN" <us271934SPAMNYET@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:cMzRd.52522$iC4.47770@newssvr30.news.prodigy.com...
> Chadwick wrote:
>> Nick wrote:
>>
>>>In fact, every morning, as I fall from my bed, I chant my little
>>
>> mantra -
>>
>>>"Water boiled, Coffee Spoiled". And then I have a cup of tea instead,
>>
>>
>>>because I can't afford to risk an accident.
>>
>>
>> Oh! And it was going so well!
>>
>> You see, tea really does need boiling water. It releases the tanins.
>> That's why machines can't make tea - because they rarely boil the
>> water. You also need to get the teabag out again pretty pronto else it
>> goes bitter.
>>
>> And yes, it does make a difference if you put the milk in first. Don't
>> even go there.
>>
> Down here in Texas we make sun tea. Tea bags in a big jar of water setting
> in the sun on a nice hot summer day. Served over ice. Yummy! And no evil
> Steam ;-)

Do you have a spare room?

 

[Guest]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

Peter Lykkegaard wrote:
> "Chadwick" wrote
>
>
>>Erm... Can I hide behind semantics, and claim that if you order
>>"coffee" (or "coorrfee" if you're John Travolta in Saturday Night
>>Fever) in a restaurant, you will get a different drink than if you
>>order a "cappuccino"?
>>
>
> No need to as Cappuccino has more in common with Expresso than with coffee

Should we add a "Frappuccino" into the mix aswell, just for good measure


--
Ben Cottrell AKA Bench

All these modern celebrities are endorsing supermarket products now...
I got a pack of sausages from Tesco the other day and there was this
picture of Anthony Worral Thompson on the front. Below, it read 'prick
with a fork'.

 

[nick]

Archived from groups: alt.games.half-life (More info?)

"Ben Cottrell" <bench@bench333.screaming.net> wrote in message
news:37ubbqF5f752jU3@individual.net...
> Peter Lykkegaard wrote:
>> "Chadwick" wrote
>>
>>
>>>Erm... Can I hide behind semantics, and claim that if you order
>>>"coffee" (or "coorrfee" if you're John Travolta in Saturday Night
>>>Fever) in a restaurant, you will get a different drink than if you
>>>order a "cappuccino"?
>>>
>>
>> No need to as Cappuccino has more in common with Expresso than with
>> coffee
>
> Should we add a "Frappuccino" into the mix aswell, just for good measure
>

You're just trying to stir things up.