dvdpiddy's revenge (part 2)

As the moon rose quietly in the sky, it's soft light beautifully reflected off
of her long flowing plaid her. Standing in front of the mirror, she adjusted her
fourteen nipple rings, and the fuzzy dice hanging from her nose. A PM from
DVD had alerted her of his desire, and she was only too happy to oblige.

As she rushed out the door she grabbed her keys and custom 14-inch concrete
dildo and raced for the car. Love was in the air. Every stop along the way to
DVD's place could not be made fast enough. Although, deep-down, every swipe
of the credit card for donuts, pork chips, lube, and hefty bags, did add to the
excitement of what lay ahead...

Sure DVD was an AMD fanboy, but he wasn't like the others. He was special.
This she knew right away, even before reading his hospital bracelet. No man
had ever crashed into a door like that. Real men don't need periods, comma's,
those are for the weak. Besides, she was fully aware of what needed
to be done, and time dictated that good grammer could not, should not, and would
not be used. Her heart raced. Sure, he had multiple personalities, but they
were all hers, and she loved each one more than the next.

As she raced down the highway at super-sonic speeds, her mind flashed back
to the first time they had met. The sight of DVD swinging his bat wildly at the
'04 Intel swapmeet, had made her flush with desire. As she stepped over blood-
soaked dying hands still holding warm Prescotts, her heart raced as no man
had made it do before. If this wasn't love building up inside her, she didn't
know what love was.

She got to DVD just as he had completed his last plung of the bat into a P4
test bed. They turned towards each other, and their eyes locked for what
seemed like forever. The smell of blood, urine, and smoldering Prescotts
only added to the excitement. Even as thousands lie dead or dying, they
both felt alone, as if all was created for them and them alone...

What can I say... Move over Harry Potter, The saga of piddy the fanboy conqueror hits book shelves tuesday.... When can we expect the next installment King???

:trophy:

11 trophys out of a possible 10.. :lol:

Fantastic!!!! Absolutely great!!!! A fledgling Wingding!!!!

No need to quote the whole thing...

Part III


She made her way across the living room, walking softly like an Indian. The
muted crunching of pretzels and long hardened donuts were heard underfoot.
Her heart skipped a beat. A sight like no other. One ball hung uselessly out of
the side of his eons old Superman Underoos. His home-made towel cape had
long since lost it's shine. As he slept, a foul sound slowly, almost as it was afraid
to come out, creaped from his fluttering anus like a cow trapped in a tanker's prop.
Bap-bap-bap-thddddddp...her heart and the house shook once more. She could
still see him through the newly created fog, as the living room now looked the
same as a desert road as seen from a distance. In his sleep he began to mutter.
Excitedly she leaned in closer to listen...

"F...fa...fa...f**kin' intel" rolled whistfully from his crusty lips. "Thhh...tha..
they...run...hot..." She knew exactly what he meant. She had to have him.

From her bag, she pulled out her small shop-vac and proceeded to clean him
of crumbs, spilt O'duel's, and something resembling dried Ivory soap. He was
a wild man, who's idea of violent sex was tearing the pages out. Playboy
pictures were everywhere. She brushed those aside and wiped the flacky
months old drool from his bottom lip.

He started to stir. She gently, slowly, gave a tug on the bottom of his briefs.
Nothing. She pulled harder, leaning back. Still nothing. She firmly planted
her foot on his ribcage and pulled with all her might. It stretched, but still
wouldn't budge. Lifting a leg she could see something only one could dream
of. A wedgie of such pentration seemly held in place by a layer of rancid
brown glue that only a sugar and high-fructose corn syrup diet can produce.
Her patience held fast, as she knew it was all going to be worth it soon.

Again she reached for her bag. She pulled out her concrete dildo and securely
fasten it to her Dewalt. 18 volts of high-torque love and foreplay. She placed
it angled in from the right cheek and set it to the third speed. If love
and 2000rpm's couldn't free him, nothing would.

As she slowly began to pull the trigger, he shifted slightly and let out a bucking,
bellowing cough. Her quick reflexes spun her around as a softball sized lint
ball shot from his belly button and splatted again the wall like a whole roll
spitball. She watched breathlessly as it slowly slid down the wall like the
after-birth down the leg of newly proud rhino mother. As it slid, the ball left
a trail of slime and burnt wall paper, and she raced across the room and began
to run her tongue along the length of it. Her nostrils expanded to take in the smell
of fried paper and glue as the tip of her tungue absorbed the amber
trail of man made lint ball. Simply heaven.

Once again she turned towards her man. The snoring blob of puss and lard
heaved up and down and wiggled like two rats wrestling under the skin of a
recently deceased farm animal. "Damn those underoos!" and she marched
forward with renewed passion.

With added might might, the Dewalt powered dildo again was thrust into his
sh*t compacted ass-crack. No longer simply easing into it, she immediately
gave it full power. As if by command, the sleeping giant lifted slightly allowing
the love machine better access. Soon powerful flakes of man-waste were
being flung around the room like a grenade in a small rabbit's head. She was
making progress. Inch-by-inch the concrete love-tool burrowed ever deeper
into the mess. Then finally, after seemingly hours...BAM! Like a cannon the
dildo broke through catching the underoos and pulling them into itself like a
high speed winch. At last his manhood was free. Or so she thought...

Too bad Lieutenant General Wingding nolonger dwells, he would have quite the critiquing going on your masterpiece. Bravo, King, Bravo.

Holy-freakin' hell!

8O Time. Hands. Great quantity, thereof. 8O

Part IV


Now exposed, she could see his matted pie-shaped mound of hair. Upon closer
inspection, the markings of nearly fresh cat turds and maple syrup were now
noticable. As she leaned forward to get a better smell from his willy, she reached
up and undid the safety pin holding on his cape. Undone, she tossed it across
the room, by sheer luck covering his yarn collection of famous presidents.

Underoos and cape gone, now it was time for the Hulkamania t-shirt. Luckily,
it was so old is simply pulled off, in true Hulkster fashion. Finally, DVD was at
last naked. Getting up from her knees, she brushed aside the ear-hair and whispered
into his ear, "Honey, are you ready?"

Instantly, DVD shot upright. The sheer mass of him moving so suddenly caused
a cloud of food bits, dried soda clumps, and anal flakes to burst into the air
like baby powder. Seeing this she stood up and removed her clothes.

Stunned, DVD sat there speechless. Jaw dropped, arms slackened, only the
sound of air passing through his open mouth and the slight whistle of an old
pork chop bone trapped in his air passage could be heard.

"Wha...wha...what's wrong sweetie?" she asked.

"Nothing. I've just never done this before. I'm not sure I ca..." he replied sheepishly.

"It's OK babe, I'm very good at what I do." she responded.

"No, no, no, it's not that. I've had sex before."

"Then what's the problem?" she asked, getting nervous.

"It's just...it's just...your a...a woman!" He stammered.

"Let me ask you something hun'. Do you like surprises?" she said, her voice
oddly getting slightly deeper.

At the same time getting more relaxed, DVD responds, "Of course I do. Don't
all little boys?"

"Good, then relax!" she said sexily.

Then she put both hands on his shoulders and gently, yet firmly, pushed him
back into the armchair and instructed him to close his eyes. He did as he was
told and felt her again kneeling down before him. At once he felt the warmth of
a warm, wet mouth on his little love-pole, and let out a relaxing sigh. He
nervously reached down to feel a vagina for the first time, but was surprised
to find as she spread her legs something very familiar pop from between her
legs. A small, but firm penis jumped at attention, slowly oozing love-juice
from it's perfectly round helmut. Finally, he was able to totally relax. As she/he
bobbed on his pole, humming gently, he knew, just knew, that tonight, all alone
with Forlorn, would be the best night ever.



The End.

I almost died of laughter. My side hurts.

I loled.

I wouldn't term it as irorny.... But certainly a plot twist.... Bravo.....Had it an element of conspiricy theory the sleuth in us all would have said... Chit I shoulda' seen that comming

Scary thought... Dat' fooker messing with minds for a living....having taken both the Necrophiliatic & Hypocratic oaths...

Bloody funny, mate! Great tale.

Who's been bashed? Not me. Are you thinking maybe dvdpiddy wrote it?


Your cross makes me dizzy, although it might be from the alter wine I stole.


To be bashed one has to be offended, for me, I can't be! Bring it on, I'll laugh
harder than you. But only if you're funny...

*looks at watch while tapping foot*

Dude, that was sooooo not funny. Try swearing, or calling someone the end
result of bodily functions or something...

With a running start....






*smack*

Cute drawing, but get back on the phone with your mom and try again...

Cute drawing, but get back on the phone with your mom and try again... C'mon it was funny, teh buttsechs = KingLoftusXII.
What's so funny? Did I miss something?

Yes you did. ===D = penis, * = anus. Cute, for 3rd graders...

No, it's ok to joke around, just be funny.

*looks at watch tapping foot*

WTF are you talking about?

If I'm not mistaken....you...

Well, he is lofty

Mike.

You truely are a joke. A bad one at that. A four part story making you look fat and
gay, and you're worried about the title.

you should read it, lofty put much time and effort into making a story about you