Here is what you need to do. Get your own account again. After sharing an account with the wife in several MMORPG and havng my son use both my account and hers, you don't want to be sharing accounts.
There is no software that is constantly checking for a running application on another PC outside of the big n' pricy enterprise software. Try winternals software. http://technet.microsoft.com/en-us/sysinternals/default.aspx
There should be a few programs in there that will allow you to check on remote computers and what they are running. MS bought them out, and stopped offering things that they used to, which I think is a crime, but they still offer you some things.