How do I find my router on Windows Vista

Hello, I am suffering a problem. We have houses that are next to each other. My parents said what the hell you can use our internet for half price. SO! I need to know how to find the router it wont show up in the Network and Sharing Center. Nor, Will it show up in the Network. First I need to find it. Then I have to reset the access for it. So I can reset the internals. I can not locate it to find its IP so I can get into the router bios. Help is Needed.
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