e8400 overclock help!

this is my first complete build and overclock. i am running:
Core 2 Duo e8400 @ 3.825ghz(425x9) vcore 1.232 41/59C Load
Crucial Ballistix 4gb(2x2gb) DDR2 800 @ 850mhz 4-4-4-12 2.18v
eVGA 8800GTS(g92) 512mb slightly over stock
OCZ SilentXStream 600w PSU
Arctic Cooling Freezer 9 or 7 92mm
Gigabyte P35-DS3L Mobo

I am having some problems with adjusting the vcore on the CPU... i will go in and slightly change it in the bios, but the vcore seems to go between 1.216 / 1.232 / 1.248. Is that normal? in the bios i am setting it to around 1.29 and it shows 1.232 CPU-z load. those temps were taken with realtemp, is that OK to run at or do you think its too hot? i am also kind of lost with the memory timings. i will probably be pushing the ram a bit more and i dont really know what to do other than 4-4-4-12 and 5-5-5-15. is there some guide on how to fine tune these? in addition, i may try and get the overclock to break 4ghz. any help would be much appreciated.

Not necessarily true. Higher frequency does mean better performance, but many people has found that setting the fsb to ram ratio to 1:1 offers the best performance. Although you wouldn't really notice the small difference, as long as you have the timings set accordingly, there is no point in having ram faster than necessary (1:1).

Fair enough, I've never had DDR-800 RAM, have 1066, so I never run it 1:1.

My CPU needs 1.4 to get 3.85 stable, but I expect the newer batches to do a lot better.

No... your core will always be very much higher than your actual CPU... dont worry about +60C. It doesnt make a diff.
Memory timings: Once you get to where you want to be and are CPU stable... that's when you want to mess with timings and get them as low as possible. A good way to test is blend prime95 or orthos.
For 4Ghz it depends on your board. I can set 1800mhz FSB link and sync (1:1) for a nice 900mhz overclock on the memory and run 5-5-5-15 timings. Just bump up vcore, fsb, nb, sb and memory voltages to apporpriate settings. Again depends on the board. Usually the cpu will need between 1.325 and 1.425V for 4.05ghz. Some have had better luck with 500mhz with 8x multi. I like the less stressful 450mhz though.

You are on the right track... just keep tweaking and testing! Dont worry about the temps with a 4.0ghz overclock. As long as you arent running much above 1.4v and have a good HSF mount you should be good under 60C. I have heard and read so much contraversial issues with the temps on these little 45nm chips. There are a lot of bugs in the sensors and the core varies tremendously.

You probably should, since you're running at 425Mhz FSB speeds.

Only mess with voltages if you run into instability issues

Your temps are fine, assuming that "42/57 C" means 42 idle - 57 load. You're good for another 10 degrees. You also have a really low voltage, so you can raise that without issues.

Don't worry about pushing it further, when your RAM can't take it, your Prime95 will crash, no big deal. You can also check your RAM stability with Memtest if you want to.

^^ that is very good IMO.