E7200 Overclocking weird on my board.

Here is my system:
E7200
Corsair 650w
4gb 800mhz (5-4-4-15) OCZ
680i LT XFX
9800GTX XFX
Antec p182 Case
4 120mm fans cooling
ThermalTake Big Typhoon XV
2 160gb WD HDD.

Alright so I have a few questions about how to overclock this thing, currently its running at 3.53ghz.... Idle is: 45c and load is about 55c. Is that too hot for this processor? Second off I would love to see this thing hit like 4ghz. But with the 680i (its suppose to be a great overclocker) people say oh put the FSB to 400mhz with the 9.5 multiplier and youll get 3.8ghz. My question though for the 680i is the FSB doesnt adjust like 400mhz, I have to put it around 1500mhz to put it at 3.53. If I hike of the bus speed past that to push it, it just crashes. I have the memory on the rate 5-4-4-15 and running at 900mhz. Should I adjust the mhz of the memory at all? The Voltage is also at a 1.325volts.
Thanks!