is it bad if the heatsink (Asus Square EVO) is touching or pressing on the ram sticks (OCZ Reapers)?  Should i replace the ram?  i can't fit in 4, which was the overall plan, but i can definitely only get the two in there.  suggestions or comments much appreciated.

I think you should be okay, as long as its not pressing to hard against the dimm slot.
 
I guess you couldn't take the top part of it off?
 

 

 
They are design to catch airflow to cool off, but if its too much pressure not sure.