Not all 955's can reach 3.6ghz on stock voltage, I know mine can't game on those settings, however I can do simple tasks like music, videos, and web browsing on stock voltage.
Your HT Link speed should be equal or lower than your Northbridge speed. The formula is your RAM's type (DDR2 or DDR3 will be the multiplier) and speed (400mhz or 800mhz) So for example: DDR3 1600mhz RAM = 3 x 800mhz = 2400mhz on the NB/HT Link speed. I keep my voltage on auto, since I haven't had problems with that yet.
Just curious, but how come your load temps are so high? Do you have a closed case with just 1 exhaust fan?