Notebook drives tend to be pretty manufacturer-specific and even model-specific. You may have to either send it to Asus or, if you are confident inside a computer, see if they will ship you the replacement DVD drive and swap it yourself. Warning: if you haven't done that sort of thing before, it may break your PC.
Why would Asus wipe your hard drive to replace the DVD drive? Did you check with them that that would actually happen? They may simply warn that it is possible.
Do a backup before sending the machine in and it won't matter anyway.