my motherboard doesnt support it, i know i should get a phenom II x4 at least in this machine, and the budget is what ever is best for it. im not looking for a single upgrade, i want to know if any one could give me a road map so to speak for this machine.
You can get a, say, HD 6850 that would be a big upgrade. Or a HD 6870. The CPU is good for now, wait for the new AM3+ socket and the new Bulldozer CPUs (a few months away at most) and then decide between Intel and AMD. If you go AMD you will be able to use your current CPU and maybe unlock it. Also a Samasung Spinpont F3 500GB or 1TB if you need more disk space.
I agree with mosox. Upgrade your GPU; that won't be money wasted, as you can move it into a new rig if you decide to rebuild. Otherwise, you may get all the performance improvement you need just from a new GPU.
I am hoping it comes out in Q2, but I'm not sure it's safe to hold my breath. I believe its performance will be higher than Phenom II, and hope it will be comparable to SB. I am also expecting significantly lower power use, which will make it my choice for an upgrade.