Since the memories controller is what looks after the chips and address locations, I do not think you can find the exact chip with most software.
Memtest will show you the range of the failing memory so a stick that fails at 150 megabytes in for instance(8 chip 2gig stick) is most likely in the first chip. But how do we know what chip the memory controller accesses as first.
That said, I do NOT recommend SPD flashing unless you HAVE to slow down the ram for compatibility with some older boards/laptops(some laptops do not feed enough voltage to operate at SPD speeds(lets say 400mhz ram has to be backed to 333 in spd so the board stops running it at 400 and crashing), I have yet to run into a desktop with this issue).
Are you actually looking to solder a new chip onto the board? Most memory has a lifetime warranty now days.
I know this is not the answer you want, but I think you have your work cut out for you.
Testing one stick at a time is the standard, but sometimes to sticks fail while one works(most times just a slight voltage increase will fix this).