The current Intel nehalem and sandy bridge cpu's have an excellent integrated ram controller. It is able to keep the cpu fed with data from any speed ram.
The difference in real application performance or FPS between the fastest and slowest ram is on the order of 1-3%.
Synthetic benchmark differences will be impressive, but are largely irrelevant in the real world.
Fancy heat spreaders are mostly marketing too.
Only if you are seeking record level overclocks should you consider faster ram or better latencies.
Read this Anandtech article on memory scaling:
http://www.anandtech.com/show/4503/sandy-bridge-memory-scaling-choosing-the-best-ddr3/1
---------------bottom line------------
DDR3 1600 is the sweet spot.
I see no negative with 16gb. No game will use more than 2-3gb, but lots of ram will be used by windows to keep code in ram, ready for instant launch.
Ram is sold in kits for a reason.
Ram from the same vendor and part number can be made up of differing manufacturing components over time.
Some motherboards can be very sensitive to this.
Although, I think the problem has lessened with the newer Intel chipsets. Still,
it is safer to get what you need in one kit.
It often turns out that a single kit will be cheaper too.