so my cpu isnt the bottleneck? its my ram?
You can determine if the CPU is or isn't your bottleneck by checking if your PSU is running all out when you're playing BF3. If both cores are running at their maximum, or very close to it, then your CPU is causing a bottleneck and will need to upgrade to a better CPU.
If you are encountering a lot of page file swapping then you don't have an adequate amount of RAM. You will then need to add more system RAM.