FIRST TIME POSTER PLEASE HELP (Warning, lot of questions...)

HIYA GUYS, I hope you like reading. So as the title states, I am a first time poster on this forum. Four hours ago I dove into the opaque world of laptops with the intention of finding my perfect baby only to quickly become just so incredibly bogged down by the sheer amount of information to take in. I'm talking laptop inception status. Just circles of crap within crap that I've been wading through for hours. Well to cut my crying short there are several questions that I have for the community, the first and foremost being:

1) I've narrowed down my search to the products below, and was wondering which you guys think is the best, while factoring in price, performance, etc. My uses will be gaming (I want to play League of Legends at maximum resolution with NO NO NO lag)/college life/research/videos -cough pron cough-/casual browsing:






And here are my questions:

2) Not really a direct question, but this is the most important one: do you guys have any laptop suggestions for the following specs?

Budget: $500-750 (800 if I starve myself)
Processing: i3, i5, AMD A8
Graphics: The best I can get, honestly.
RAM: 4 GB DDr3, won't be needing any more.
Memory: 300gb+
Speed: 2.0gHz+
Size: 17"
Resolution: 1920x1600 or 1600x900 (bleh)

Like I mentioned earlier I'll primarily be playing League, maybe some World of Warcraft. I really really want to play LoL at the highest graphic setting with no lag ugh I abhor lag. Remember, I'm not looking for the best laptop within my budget I can find, but the cheapest laptop that can run League at the best settings possible. And yes, I'm really obsessed with League.

3) Is laptop #1 just absolute trash for the price? As in are the specs too low and the price too high?

4) What is CPU, and what is GPU? I did some poking around and CPU is the central processor and GPU is some shamallama to do with graphics, but what does that MEAN? Is CPU the i5/A8, and GPU the graphics card?

5) How good of a graphics card will I need to play League at maximum graphics with no lag? Please point out one of the cards on this page:

6) How does ANYONE figure out which graphics card is good and which isn't? This is the part that really busts my balls into kaleidoscopic smithereens. For example Radeon 7640 > 6620, but Radeon 6490 > 7520. Like WTF? And some 5000s are totally superior to some 7000s while some 7000s are way better than some 6000s like seriously where does the madness stop so I can get off?

7) At around the 3 hour mark I thought I was finally getting the hang of everything, until I saw one of these: How is that laptop worth $999 when laptop #5 up there is only $780? Is Intel 4000 HD just really that good? Or is VAIO just jacking up the price really hard? Or is there something that I'm totally missing?

8) Double rainbows? What does it mean?

Well those are all I can think of for now. If there were too many questions for you please at least just answer the first two, those are the important ones. The rest are pretty much me just b*tching about how complicated everything is. Also LAST QUESTION are the specs that I mentioned above overkill for what I want to do (maximum League settings)? Could I really just meet my standards with and i3 and 4gig RAM and a Radeon 7640G? Thanks for reading this far guys, please shed some light along this narrow path T___T
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More about first time poster warning questions
  1. For league of legends the A8 will be enough, Also this is looking good:

    For browsing and watching videos any of those will be good enough. If you are doing video encoding/recoding, i suggest getting the i5 or i7. The intel graphics kick ass in video encoding(quicksync).
  2. IMHO, as emphatic as you are about "no lag" you are wasting your time on your budget. Laptops are NOT portable desktops. They are MUCH less powerful for the dollar spent. Plus, they get hot when worked hard. There are plenty of posts on this forum like you who are disappointed with their laptop's performance. You can spend more money and get better performance but NEVER like a desktop. Those are the facts. I'm just trying to save you some money.
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