FW: DNC Program

Subject: FW: OFFICIAL 2004 Democratic National Convention PROGRAM

6:00pm - Opening flag burning ceremony.
6:30pm - Anti-war rally no. 1.
6:40pm - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
7:00pm - Tribute theme to France.
7:10pm - Collect offerings for al-Zawahri defense fund.

7:20pm - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
7:25pm - Tribute theme to Spain.
7:45pm - Anti-war rally no. 2. (Moderated by Michael Moore)

8:00pm - John Kerry presents one side of the issues.

8:25pm - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:30pm - Terrorist appeasement workshop.
9:00pm - Gay marriage ceremony.
9:30pm - * Intermission *
10:00pm - Flag burning ceremony no. 2.
10:15pm - Re-enactment of Kerry's fake medal toss.

10:30pm - Cameo by Howard Dean's "Yeeeawwwrrrrg!!!!"

10:40pm - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
10:50pm - Pledge of allegiance to the UN.

11:00pm - Double gay marriage ceremony.
11:30pm - Pictures with Fidel Castro.
Midnight - Grand Finale, the group singing of Oh Canada!


<i><font color=red>Edited by Scamtron on 10/11/01 09:58 PM

ROFLMFAO - (it's still sad) ...





<b> ...more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol - W.C. Fields </b>

I was going to edit the canadian part out but figured I'd just cut and paste it as I found it.

<i><font color=red>Edited by Scamtron on 10/11/01 09:58 PM

Pretty good, but look what I found.

Subject: FW: OFFICIAL 2004 Republican National Convention PROGRAM

6:00pm - Opening Jesus/Bush worship ceremony.
6:30pm - Retarded criminal execution no. 1.
6:40pm - Dick Cheney consumes baby.
7:00pm - Tribute theme to Iceland.
7:10pm - Collect offerings for RIAA offense fund.

7:20pm - Dick Cheney consumes baby.
7:25pm - Tribute theme to Palau.
7:45pm - Retarded criminal execution no. 2 (Flip switched by Orin Hatch)

8:00pm - George Bush presents no side of the issues.

8:25pm - Dick Cheney consumes a baby.
8:30pm - Terrorist creation workshop.
9:00pm - Stoning of gay couple.
9:30pm - * Intermission *
10:00pm - Jesus/Bush worship ceremony no. 2.
10:15pm - Re-enactment of Bush's fake military service.

10:30pm - Cameo by Dick Cheney's "Go fu<b></b>ck yourself."

10:40pm - Dick Cheney consumes a baby.
10:50pm - Pledge of allegiance to the bible.

11:00pm - Double stoning of gay couple.
11:30pm - Pictures with Prince Bandar.
Midnight - Grand Finale, the group singing of John Ashcroft's "Let the Eagle Soar!"


-------------------------------------------
<font color=blue> "Trying is the first step towards failure." </font color=blue>

Low blow Dh. Can't you stick to your eloquent and appropriate rebuttles instead of this crap?

A pessimist knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

I think the cheney eats a baby thing is from a south park episode where they eat dead babies to get stronger.

<i><font color=red>Edited by Scamtron on 10/11/01 09:58 PM

Low blow ksoth. Can't you stick to your eloquent and appropriate rebuttles instead of this crap?

<i><font color=red>Edited by Scamtron on 10/11/01 09:58 PM

The point I was making is that most creative people, such as cartoonists and musicicans are liberal. Can you imagine the rebuplican party after the convention? White guys standing around discussing sluggish foreign markets. The music would be Garth Brooks.

The democratic party would have comedians, cartoonists, and yes, minorities. The music would be from any liberal minded musician(s), R.E.M., red hot chili peppers, U2, The Offspring, New Found Glory, Blink-182 or pretty much any rapper.

A pessimist knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

Uhm, the idea that Dick Cheney gets his powers from consuming babies is more comical than saying Democrats burn flags and pose with Fidel Castro...

-------------------------------------------
<font color=blue> "Trying is the first step towards failure." </font color=blue>

The South Park episode was about stem cell research, where Christopher Reeve was championing extending stem cell research on discarded fetuses. But, in the episode, Reeve got cured of his paralysis by sucking the juices from the dead fetuses. It was hilarious.

I just said Cheney eats babies because there are so many pictures of him grimacing in such a way that it looks like ultimate evil is shining through, so whats better than to say he eats babies, being so evil and all.

-------------------------------------------
<font color=blue> "Trying is the first step towards failure." </font color=blue>

Stop being ridiculous. Cheney would only eat babies if it was proved that eating them helps one's heart problems.

A pessimist knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

How can he continue to get fresh babies delivered to the bunker he lives in?

A pessimist knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

In the bunker he has 700 young women chained to beds who are impregnated by Ashcroft and Rumsfeld, so there is always a fresh supply.

Cheney's current project is trying to impregnate Condaleeza Rice. This child will be leader of the PNAC and king of the great empire of darnkess.

Now I have to go take a nasty crap. I'm about to bust an o-ring.

-------------------------------------------
<font color=blue> "Trying is the first step towards failure." </font color=blue>