Dear Mr. Zoron:
We at the faculty of the University of San Moritz wish you to know that you have been nominated for a bachelor's degree in English. Our faculty have reviewed your extensive public work published on the internet and believe that for as little as $99.95 (US funds only, please) we would be able to award you this useful credential.
Our nominating committee recognize your accomplishments in the field of English in lieu of the hours of coursework that the other less up-to-date institutions ask for, and all that remains now is to finalize the needed tuition payment.
We regret that at present our registrar is only able to accept Western Union money orders, but trust that you will find this detail not out of the question.
Sincerely,
Rich Perez, Registrar of Students
University of San Moritz
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