Indoor Traps are Stupid

Archived from groups: rec.games.frp.dnd (More info?)

John H <mongloid2002@yahoo.com> wrote:
> Why should I mess up my gorgeous inner sanctum with traps. It
> messes up the whole color scheme. I need to be able to get from my
> harem to my bathtub without getting darts stuck in my foot.

That's why you don't put them in your house. At least not the parts you
live in.

You put them in the crypts where you buried your ancestors (with their
treasures), on the path to your treasury, around your *secret* sanctum
(the one where you do stuff you *really* don't want to be interrupted
at), the dungeon where you keep dangerous prisoners, dangerous items,
and other stuff you don't want getting out.

Y'know, places you don't want people to get at easily.

Around your livingroom, no. Around places people need to get around (or
at least the places you want people to be able to get around), probably
not. Hey, servants are cheap, and you really only want the ones who are
alert -- those pesky heroes are tricksy at getting in, so you want
servants who are on their toes and paying attention to what's going on
around them.

If they can't remember to push the trigger that disarms a particularly
nasty trap before bringing you your breakfast... poor memory combined
with lousy reflexes means they'd never make it in the real world.
You're doing them a favor, really, saving them the trouble. And
improving the gene pool while you're at it!

Consider the time and trouble you put yourself to, the inconvenience
(breakfast is late *again*), all in an effort to train your employees to
be their best and improve society. You should be commended, really.


Keith
--
Keith Davies "Trying to sway him from his current kook-
keith.davies@kjdavies.org rant with facts is like trying to create
keith.davies@gmail.com a vacuum in a room by pushing the air
http://www.kjdavies.org/ out with your hands." -- Matt Frisch

Archived from groups: rec.games.frp.dnd (More info?)

On 2 Jul 2005 21:50:22 -0700, "John H" <mongloid2002@yahoo.com> scribed
into the ether:

> Why should I mess up my gorgeous inner sanctum with traps. It
>messes up the whole color scheme. I need to be able to get from my
>harem to my bathtub without getting darts stuck in my foot.

http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/Gi [...] ript?SK=36

That's why.

Archived from groups: rec.games.frp.dnd (More info?)

Werebat wrote:
> Matt Frisch wrote:
> > On 2 Jul 2005 21:50:22 -0700, "John H" <mongloid2002@yahoo.com> scribed
> > into the ether:
> >
> >
> >> Why should I mess up my gorgeous inner sanctum with traps. It
> >>messes up the whole color scheme. I need to be able to get from my
> >>harem to my bathtub without getting darts stuck in my foot.
> >
> >
> > http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/Gi [...] ript?SK=36
> >
> > That's why.
>
> Huh-huh. "Giant tit", huh-huh!

If you squint a bit, there's also a "poo" in there!

Laszlo

Archived from groups: rec.games.frp.dnd (More info?)

> Yes, keep all your traps behind the secret door. Secret doors are
> magnets to heroes, if they find a secret door, they'll have to
> investigate even if the door right next to it is unlocked with
> "TREASURE" or "HAREM" written on it. Then they go through the secret
> door and the trap kills them.
>
> You, and all your minions are much smarter and know that there's
> nothing interesting behind the secret doors so you are safe.

Smart minions?! No way! They will try to overthrow me. The only
smart people I deal with are my sons. I don't let them anywhere near
the palace. Out into the wilderness they go.

Archived from groups: rec.games.frp.dnd (More info?)

DougL wrote:
> John H wrote:
>
>>>Yes, keep all your traps behind the secret door. Secret doors are
>>>magnets to heroes, if they find a secret door, they'll have to
>>>investigate even if the door right next to it is unlocked with
>>>"TREASURE" or "HAREM" written on it. Then they go through the secret
>>>door and the trap kills them.
>>>
>>>You, and all your minions are much smarter and know that there's
>>>nothing interesting behind the secret doors so you are safe.
>>
>> Smart minions?! No way! They will try to overthrow me. The only
>>smart people I deal with are my sons. I don't let them anywhere near
>>the palace. Out into the wilderness they go.
>
>
> Evil overlords should have caster levels as either a Wizard or
> cleric. In either case you get 4xclass level HD worth of
> animated undead servants. And much past about level 13 those
> are nearly worthless on their own.
>
> So you use them to control command detonated traps with orders
> to set the trap off and sound the alarm when anyone other than
> you, a minion, or a concubine passes through the area.
>
> DougL
>

Undead minions are ALWAYS better than live ones:

http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/Gi [...] ript?SK=37