Very Big CPU Troubles

[TriAthlon]

Well I bought a new computer recently and i wanted to make it go faster. I surfed the web, and found a website that said to make your CPU faster take it out and something along the lines of "Buy thermal gell and spread it over the top and bottom of cpu. Put the CPU in microwave for 15 seconds on low" . I followed the directions exactly, and when i put my CPU back in, my computer just beeps. How did I follow these directions wrong? Any help would be great!

 

[jihiggs]

rofl!

how do you shoot the devil in the back? what happens if you miss? -verbal

 

[lpenix]

no way,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,lmfao


Before i put my ATHLON XP on prozac, it thought it was a PENTIUM 4

 

[4Ryan6]

If this is not a joke and you really did it, do yourself a favor, and delete your post as soon as possible.

Details, Details, Its all in the Details, If you need help, Don't leave out the Details.

 

[Kzzrn]

Good job, you just cooked your CPU.

Knowledge is the key to understanding

 

[function9]

delete his post? i was thinking more along the lines of buying a shotgun, a bottle of whiskey and one shell.

 

[Black_Cat]

For best results, cook your cpu in a conventional oven instead of a microwave. Your cpu will come out crispy and delicious every time!

To start press any key. Where's the "any" key? --Homer Simpson.

 

[JasonR]

What website did you read this ? Julia Childs ???

Cheers,
JasonR

*** Most PC problems can be fixed by using a bigger hammer ***

 

[barry_bw]

I want to buy a bigger HD for my 1998 cop. which has a pentium MMX. Will it accept a 40 GB drive. How big can I go?

 

[4Ryan6]

Don't you think our hero would get better results if he heated the shotgun shell in the oven before he used it.

Details, Details, Its all in the Details, If you need help, Don't leave out the Details.

 

[function9]

LOL!

after thinking about it though, i can see why he failed. he didn't wrap the cpu in aluminum foil! it locks in the moisture and the cpu will not come out all dry and flaky. it'll be slightly moist and oh so tender.

 

[stealthbig]

You people have been most unhelpful.

 

[Hoolio]

Well I aint never heard of this technique, and I guess no one else has heard of it either. Right a couple of things:

1. Dont put metal in a microwave, they tend to explode, trust me, we tried it to make sure....I now have a heathly green glow when I turn the lights off.

2. The microwvae works by using a strong alternating magnetic field. When metal or in your case a processor is placed in the microwave a large voltage is induced in the metallic parts of the processor, this has now destroyed the chip probably. Also if I suppose it induced a large enough voltage you could have undoped some silicon in the die. Therefore rendering it useless.

I really hope this is a joke, otherwise we will have to start a help the guy who microwaved his CPU fund.

You could try sending it back to the manufacturer (AMD or the dealer you bought it from.) If they accept it, please post a thread because it will give hope to all those people who put their processors in the microwave.

Good Luck, if this aint a joke.
BTW post the webbie address if it is true, we can kill the website owner.

 

[BigBiggist]

Oh man, You have got to be kidding me. Why the hell would u do that, jesus, are u like a stoned martha stewert. You should try a pressure cooker or something.

Look bud, if you really did that I hope u learned your lesson. Its not a good lesson but dude, i really hope u are jokin. I can't believe someone would post that on the web.

I DONT HAVE TO OVERCLOCK MY NEXT COMPUTER, I WILL THROW THE WHOLE THING IN THE MICROWAVE WITH VASELINE PUT ON IT AND WRAPPED IN FOIL, IT WILL RUN GREAT!!!!!!

 

[icy_oblivion]

I am sure that the CPU ran great for the first half a second it was in the microwave. But what good is a CPU that only works for half a second when it isn't even in a Mobo.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

 

[BigBiggist]

I am going to find that website. It will be great.

WISH ME LUCK GUYS!!!!

 

[stealthbig]

Well it was a joke. I dont think anyone would really try that. I got the idea from something i heard about how to burn CD's... Get the CD you want to burn, put peanut butter on it, and press the other CD on it. Microwave for 2 minutes. Anyway as you might see, I didnt have anything else to do on the internet. Hoolio, good one about trying to return it to mfg

 

[keysplayr2003]

Without a PCI ATA controller, you might have a 2GB or 8GB limitation. This depends on your systems BIOS type and version. I dont think you can go higher than 8GB with original pentium systems. AZ

 

[4Ryan6]

Thanks for the good laugh, I really needed it!

Details, Details, Its all in the Details, If you need help, Don't leave out the Details.

 

[4Ryan6]

Hey if you find that site post back.

Details, Details, Its all in the Details, If you need help, Don't leave out the Details.

 

[lhgpoobaa]

hahahaha
very funny thread

<b>My CPU cooler is so Massive it bends Space and Time! </b>

 

[LED]

I want to buy a bigger HD for my 1998 cop. which has a pentium MMX. Will it accept a 40 GB drive. How big can I go?

That was the most out of place post I ever saw. Like a bald white man at a buckwheat look-a-like contest.

This sig runs too hot.

 

[Crashman]

I have a 1996 Pentium board by DTK that right now is supporting an 80GB and a 40GB drive in BIOS at full size.

<font color=blue>You're posting in a forum with class. It may be third class, but it's still class!</font color=blue>

 

[MeTaLrOcKeR]

U also....LOL......u out of palce posting people! lol j/k =)

<A HREF="http://www.anandtech.com/mysystemrig.html?id=13597" target="_new">-MeTaL RoCkEr</A>

 

[MeTaLrOcKeR]

Bud......................

I've heard it all..........but this...OMFG.......i never laughed so hard about a computer part in my life......LoL

<A HREF="http://www.anandtech.com/mysystemrig.html?id=13597" target="_new">-MeTaL RoCkEr</A>