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Biggest dickhead customer

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Anonymous
January 12, 2001 5:58:17 AM

You guys in sales and service, whats the biggest Dickhead cust you have come across?
Anonymous
January 18, 2001 10:55:07 PM

Hello

Lets see,,,, Im a onsight tech/consultant. Here are some horror stories.

1. The guy who called me saying he couldnt upgrade his 486/33 proc. On my arrival he had a small flathead screwdriver wedged under the proc trying to pry it out. It was a packard bell with the thing soldered into the board.

2. Guy calls me asking too do some upgrades on his machine. Normal call right??? I get to his house which has three police cars in front of it, and a EMT unit. I grab my tools and head to the door. Two cops come out and say "what the hell are you doing here" I say "the guy called me to work on his computer" They say "The only thing being worked on is his head" I peek in the door and hes laying on the floor with the EMT's working on his head. Turns out his wife cracked him upside his head for some unknown reason with a blunt object. This all happened within the 1\2 hr. time frame from the time he called me till i arrived. Too make things worse he called me the next week to do the work i was supposed to do on the first visit. It was all i could do too keep astraight face.

3. Last but not least i love getting calls from people who are having crashing problems due to overheating. You open the case and the thing has got more dust in it than the Sahara. Then they complain that the computer is slow. You look at the HD and its 99.9% fragmented, running 101 things on bootup, and the registry looks like Hurricane Andrew went through it :) 

I cant complain though. These are the people that keepme in business.

cya
mark

"I thought i would never see a resonance cascade, let alone create one."
February 3, 2001 10:29:20 AM

This woman who lives 60 mile away keeps calling me for on site service. FAT CHANCE, I put it off until she comes over here.
She brought her system back for return after it would not load a game. Problem is that the game's system requirement were twice for everything she had. Hey, she bought a cheap refurbished system. She couldn't understand how a Pentium 166 with 32MB RAM and a 2MB 2D video card could not run a game requiring minumum P2 450, 64MB ram, and an 8MB 3D accelerator. It was a really cheap game with no backwards compatability.
I upgraded her to a brand new system for FREE! Then after I told her it was a different system, she was pissed off that her downloads were gone. Then she had problems with her server and believed the guy when he told her that it was her computer's fault. I talked her through all that, and she finally got her service working after 3 hours of talking to her. Now that I am thinking that I am the king of nice guys, she is going around telling people how badly she got ripped off for paying $300 for a brand new system that supposedly doesn't work.
She called me about her speakers not working. The first thing I ask her is if she had them pugged in. Then I talked to her for about 45 minutes on the phone going through the whole system. In the end I found out she had not plugged them into the wall.
Went though the same thing when she hooked up a scanner. The scanner hotline told her that her USB was not working. She had not plugged in the power supply for the scanner.
She threw away all her setup disk to the accesories she bought, then crashed the computer and wanted me to reload it. How? I only have a 33.6 connection and she was missing over 100MB of software!
She goes around telling people I lied to her when I told her it was a new computer because it has some other guys name in the registration. I told her that I simply tranfered the registration from her old hard drive, because I wasn't giving her a new copy of windows for nothing, but she doesn't believe me. I scrapped her previous computer so that I could use the registration on the new one.
She downloads free connetion software every so often that change her network configuration and then calls me when she can't connect-I tell her to call her ISP but she insist that it is my fault.
She somehow removed her volume control from her taskbar and muted the output. She then called me and told me that her soundcard died.
She has about 13 viruses on her computer from various downloads. None of them crash her computers, most are just worms, and I really don't care about who steals her information as she doesn't listen when I tell her to be carefull. She uses a 4 year old detection program and refuses to download the updates. I have not even mentioned the worms, she would just blame me!


Suicide is painless...........
Anonymous
February 3, 2001 4:44:15 PM

Hi Crashman

Dont you love people like this. Some people i run into actually take offense when you ask them a simple question like "are the speakers pluggged in" or "is the computer plugged in".
If i were you i would charge her for every hour i was their and then on top of that give her the "stupidity" sircharge bill :) . Sounds like you did all the stuff for free, but you could have made a fortune off this one LOL.

good luck
mark
techmedic pc

"I thought i would never see a resonance cascade, let alone create one."
February 3, 2001 7:16:55 PM

I did charge her $40 to upgrade to a bigger hard drive when I replaced the rest of it with the entire guts form a new one. She had filled a 2GB hard drive with 1.5GB of downlaods-things like games, freeware, etc. Stuff from unknown sources that I have never heard of. Stuff that was supposed to speed up your internet connection, etc.

Suicide is painless...........
Anonymous
February 5, 2001 3:54:03 AM

LOL

Hi again crashman. You better keep your good graces with her. She sounds like a gold mine. :)  I bet if we put ten of us techs in a room for a evening and just let the stories fly,we would have anough laughter too last us all year.

good luck on your business

mark

"I thought i would never see a resonance cascade, let alone create one."
February 6, 2001 5:24:30 PM

I had a lady customer while I was working as a computer salesman (I know, I know... I'm a nice guy nevertheless:) 
We had a horrendous number of "communication issues", as she was a newbie and listened to every single advice any random idiot would give her, but after a long time we figured she had a virus, wanted to get rid of it, and hours after she got into the store she left it with a Virus Scanner (I think it was McAfee Viruscan).

Hour later, I get a call at FutureShop, she can't install it... turns out she has aparently never seen a CD before... never mind the fact that she doesn't know where to put it or what to do with it or how it works... she's having a problem opening the Jewel case...
I figured, hey, many people have some initial trouble, so I give her the usual tips on how to grab it and where to push, until I realize that she still has the shrink-wrap on the jewel case...
by this point she's in *hysteria*, for some reason she really wants to get into it, she's telling me she's just gonna break the box to get to the CD... I barely persuaded her that breaking the case will likely break the $60 CD she just bought and to run into a kitchen get a knife and gently cut the wrap.
Well, you can imagine how much fun installation over the phone was:) 

I was on commision at that time, and all in all I earned 75 cents for abour 3-4 hours of work... fun, fun, fun:) 

I also had a guy who came in to return a print cartridge.
Now, the cartridge was open, and we had a strict policy of no-return on opened cartridges. Well, Duh! :) 
Second, he picked up the cartridge himself. We had at any point 4+ people in computer section, all eager to help and earn comission, which was decent on cartridges. Yet he decides to himself pick up whichever cartridge and blame us for selling him the wrong one.
But lastly -- the damn cartridge was empty. It was one of the big HP 42ml ones which can print out a zillion pages before they run out of ink... and this guy managed to empty it in a week and claim it wouldn't fit into his printer? How does one empty a cartridge that won't fit into his printer?
Please...
nevertheless, he started yelling, and my manager gave him the refund just to get him out of the store.
What most pisses me off is that he didn't actually GET angry. We talked, he looked at me, he saw that I absolutely wouldn't give in to his greed and wish to cheat his way out, and than started slamming his hand and yelling in a calculated manner, all planned. He came to, in my view, outright STEAL a cartridge and managed to do it in a legal way.

and then of course zillion people who would buy a 56.6K modem, return it two days later to the girls at Customer service, and then we'd discover that its a 14.4 modem in there. Return Computers with bare-bones in them. Buy digital cameras or burners, use them for a week vacation in hawai or disk-burning spree, and then return them...

People have this feeling that stealing from a large company isn't really stealing. That it is a "us vs. them" mentality, and they will do anything and everything to get out as much as they can, stoping at *nothing*.
So I get a bit peeved off at people who claim that all electronic superstore people are stoopid in the head and only try to cheat. They are right to a point -- but, believe me, customers are worse -- which is why my stint at FutureShop ended after six months and I'm now in IT business... no customers for me, thank you:) 
Anonymous
February 7, 2001 1:51:54 AM

Futureshop has got to be the biggest rip off artist store ever. It's no wonder the customers treat you guys poorly, it's because you deserve it.

99% of the staff know nothing and give stupid advice. They try to sell you whatever will give them the highest commission. You could trust a Futureshop salesman as far as you can throw him.

I used to love going to Futureshop, setting passwords in the BIOS, formatting drives, popping keyboard keys off the demo sytems,... mind you.. I was 18 at the time. I don't do that anymore. So don't hassle me about it.

You are right though, some customers are simply dickheads. I guess dickhead stores attract dickhead customers.
February 7, 2001 12:43:55 PM

>> it's because you deserve it.

thanx, nice to know you're free of prejudice. I appreciate the comment as well as your sympathy, seeing that you don't know me but feel strongly that I deserved some of the nightmarish encounters I've had with some absolutely horrifying people. Makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside:-)

and as far as the destructive aspect of your past, you'll be glad to know you're not the only one. Except for the key-popping, which is really I suppose illegal as it counts as destruction of property, all other things are luckily easily fixable (we kept a copy of all recovery CDs in the tech shop), they are just an annoyance and waste of time to us. Most dickhead customers thought they were being original and really smart doing witty and funny things like that, when as a matter of fact the same thing happened every damn single night... but as I said, if you think salesmen are bad, you should see the customers... at least *we* didn't destroy their computers out of sheer malice... and I was 18 at the time as well:) 

as far as comission goes, you're right in many departments... not in most of computers though... while selling cables and cartridges has a nice margin, computers were sold at 7% bellow cost at the time I left (that's another reason I left, couldn't make a living). So people whining and complaining they're getting ripped off on computers and that we're making huge amounts of cash... well, they are plain and simply wrong... you don't sell a working computer for under a $1000 and make profit... they're selling them just to keep the market share, that's all... the year I worked there FutureShop had 1.5 Billion of revenue and less than $3 million of profit, and that takes all departments which made profit and averages them out with computers which lost profit -- go and figure what our margins were:) 

in every avenue of life, in every store, in every workplace, you're gonna find some good people and some not so good people... FutureShop is no different, and neither are these boards.
Your intelligent and well thought-out comments are appreciated as they help place you into one of those categories....

have a great day:) 
Anonymous
February 7, 2001 2:53:11 PM

jjku

I would like too know where you work??????

And how old are you now???? 19?????

mark

"I thought i would never see a resonance cascade, let alone create one."
Anonymous
February 7, 2001 8:28:03 PM

In my infrequent stints on the sales floor I have come across:
1- I had a German lady who wanted to buy WinME in german, oh right, thats something I sell lots of in English speaking Australia, I told her we didnt have it and couldent get it, she started abusing me, You sell it you get it for me, I vant it, ve know vhere you live, I asked her if she had any relatives in Germany and she said her son was coming over from Germany on holiday next week, I said why dont you get him to bring one over with him?, Oh didnt think of that(WE WON THE BLOODY WAR BITCH!!!!!!)
2- Had a lady ring up and wanted a 64mb Creative Soundblaster live 3d video card put in a sys, someone told her it was the best video card you can get, When I told her it was a sound card, she said do you think Im stupid, I know damn well its a video card, Ive seen one working, People warned me that you guys were idiots ect ect, I pointed out that there was a very good reason it was called a SOUNDblaster live, its cause its a sound card, wouldent believe me, Then she asked me for the res on a moniter I was telling her about, I told her it was .25dpi, she said are the pixels round or oval?, by this stage I had had enough so I told her they were actually trixels, triangular shaped which gave seamless integration and were designed in conjunction with Creative to work with the Soundblaster video card, I dont know who had been talking to her, but they had totally screwed her up.
3-I sold a guy a $799 set of speakers, surround sound, 4 speakers plus a big subby for his pc, 2 days later he tried to return them, he said he couldent get the plug to fit, so he cut the plug off, rolled the wires together and stuck them in the soundcard plug!!, He seemed genuinely suprised that it didnt work!!!
Anonymous
February 8, 2001 12:00:13 AM

I do not sympathize with any of you. As for a well thought out comment? Don't thank me. It took me all about a minute to type it up. So I didn't think about it.

You are right. I don't know you. However, you chose to work at the Futureshop. Being a worker of Futureshop entitles you to take the rap from customers. That's the deal.

As to my destructive past, like I said, I did it when I was younger. Let's see... that was approximately 8 years ago. There were hardly any recovery CD's, eight years ago, or at least, there were not many computers that shipped with one.

Like I said, you guys had a quota to meet. So, your thinking is, sell whatever you can and sell lots of it. There were weekly promotions on certain items, so you had to push that item as much as you could. That item made profit.

I really enjoy the non educated types of salesman who pick up the package and read the details to you. I can read too, and I don't need some brat salesman to read to me. Read to little children, but not to me. I want some education about the product, stuff that is not listed on the box. However, most of the staff know nothing about the insides of the products.

One of the major problems when buying at Future Shop (or Futureshop) is that the sales staff don't know about any other products. So, consumers are not given enough information to make an educated guess. This is why people feel ripped off.

Someone asked me where I worked... I used to work at a computer distribution centre. Several actually. One of the most notable ones is Supercom. I currently work as the project manager for a IA/mainboard device maker in Taiwan. We do make mainboards for traditional x86 CPU's, however, we are more into the embedded market with National Semiconductor's Geode.

Sorry I can't list our current embedded projects or customers, but I assure you that you have heard about all of them.

Back to the educated reply comment. I don't wish to educate anyone here. This is a place to vent, and to talk about things. Somehow, we were all here at the same time.

No hard feelings ok?
Anonymous
February 8, 2001 12:02:14 AM

Just replied .. look at the message above yours...
Anonymous
February 8, 2001 2:37:10 AM

Hi again.

thats what i like about this forum. You can have a debate,and discussion,without the one word flames like @#$% you, B@#$ me. Even though they disagree with eachother, jjku and kodiak had something intelligent to back their opinions up. SOMETHING LACKING on other forums ive been on.

cya
mark

oh and thats four word flames...my mistake lol

"I thought i would never see a resonance cascade, let alone create one."
Anonymous
February 8, 2001 3:32:36 AM

Jiku, In your frequent forays into computer stores, did you ever stop to think how hard it is to know something about every product for sale in a shop, Music software is a field in its own right, as is networking and video, and the hardest thing to find out is info from a manufacturer about thier pc's, I spent 70 mins on the phone to IBM trying to find out if the 94A has a 7200rpm hdd, In the end they said "We think it does", I could have told the cust that myself, In the tech bay we ring a manufacturer, put the phone on speaker and carry on with our business, they answer eventually, one arvo at 3-55 we rang HP, went home at 5-00 came back the next day and the hold music was still playing and a voice was still saying we appreciate your call ect, The average salesman does not have the time to do this, and if someone does not know something they just say sorry mate, We dont know,look on the net, and move on to the next person, pretty callous I know, but sales managers dont get up at sales meetings and say congrats jiku, you spent 8 hrs on hold this week and helped 3 people, they say congrats Jiku you sold $44,000 this week and saw 215 people, thats the cold hard facts of reality, and the fact that someone works at a superstore does not give the public the right to abuse them, Ive lost count of the people Ive hang up on.
February 8, 2001 1:43:12 PM

hmm... your reply was the same as the initial one...
You inherently believe that the computer salesmen are less then you -- less intelligent, less worthy of your respect, and that you have a higher moral right to abuse them as you see fit. Once again, it speaks more about you than about them.
Yes, I'm turning this personal... you may be speaking in general terms, but when somebody uses the word "you" so many times in a paragraph, one cannot help but feel targeted...


Destructive past wise, you were 18 -- an adult human being, supposedly responsible for your own actions. Don't care if you are now 21 or 31 or 41, it is nevertheless a good indicator of your attitude and mentality toward other human beings. Especially since you so proudly point out that it took them way longer to fix those problems than it does today. I can't connect with that, I guess I just don't have the sheer level of malice in me... sorry...And we wonder why prices go up... who do you think pays for 3 hour overtime to fix computers some jerk messed up because he thought he was being cool? :-)


I worked at FutureShop for 6 months so I could pay for my university -- it was hardly a lifelong preoccupation for me:) 
We got three weeks of training, which is not something you get at non-commisioned stores -- I know because I personally applied at Staples, Office Depot and other places. If you want to buy a computer at Staples, you'll get a generic guy who sold furniture 10 minutes ago and will sell some nice binders ten minutes after you leave... you can't tell me he offers you better knowledge then FutureShop guys who are trained and work in a specific area. Well, you can, only you'd be wrong:) 


FutureShop salesmen, beside the initial 3 week training, got weekly training and oral quizes on current products we carry. They are supposed to do 'shopping' on their own free time -- which means go to other stores and see how they compare. They are supposed to watch the market, check out the tech news. They are supposed and many of them try to do all this -- but there is only so much time in a day...

I am a total computer geek, but with 4-5 new systems in every single week, zillion accessories which have some exotic purpose one can only guess at, and trying to help people that are here now, keep the shelves clean and organized, load and unload the merchandise, etc, well, excuse me for not knowing every little detail:) 


Don't get me wrong; I know much, *MUCH* better than you do whay kind of scum can work at FutureShop. Believe me on this one, you don't know half the story.
What bugs me is that some people tend to think that because some salesmen are scum, that we all are, and that it justifies them in being scum themselves to any unsuspecting, innocent guy out there. It doesn't. We're all human beings, innocent until proven guilty.
I made a damn fine salesman that maybe didn't bring that much profit into the store but I helped any customer as much as I could to the point that many of the regulars become friends of mine. While not proud of everything my company did, I am proud of the things I did, and I won't let some prejudiced know-it-all with no ability to think outside the envelope to mess with me.

So there! :-) LOL
I'm done ranting now...:) 
February 8, 2001 7:59:24 PM

yeah next time tell her you're charging $50 an hour. :smile:

----------------------
I don't hate Intel............ Do I?
February 11, 2001 3:26:41 AM

And how exactly am I supposed to clean up the regestry? Don't know much about the regestry, but know enough to get in trouble.

Someday I will stop asking all the questions!
Anonymous
February 12, 2001 1:38:59 AM

My reply was the same as the initial one? What does that mean?

You make yourself sound so victimized. I am sorry that you had such a bad time working in such a harsh environment. Perhaps sales is not your ballgame.

I am an engineer that needs to work with all of the new silicon that comes out. We design systems so that they will be ready to see in your "Futureshops". It is my job to know what new silicon comes out, and what it can work with so that we can design the new things.

The people at Futureshop, their job is to sell things and to know exactly what is going in and out of their store. That is their job. You don't see me complaining that there is new silicon from all the manufacturers. It's the sales guys' job to find out what is going on.

Perhaps I am just unlucky and I meet up with the wrong sales guys all of the time. Maybe life would have been better if I had met you in their place. Perhaps you could have educated me on the things that I didn't know.
Anonymous
February 12, 2001 1:51:56 AM

I guess all of this arguing means that there is something inherently wrong in the system.

I have worked in the sales dept, and as a sales manager. I have also worked behind the scenes, and as a distributor. Now, I am in dev... So I realize there are problems with it.

Perhaps my expectations from salesmen are too high. Oh well, this industry has been a buyer beware industry since the beginning. It will always be....
February 13, 2001 8:55:25 AM

jjku, you sit and spout about all of your expertise and years in the industry

How on earth could you expect a salesperson who makes no more than 10-15 bucks an hour to educate you and better yet, why would you even need their assistance?

Yes, you are too demanding in your expectations and that is the main problem with dickhead customers.
February 15, 2001 12:47:08 AM

$5.70 Canadian was the minimum when I worked, if you're talking $15 US you're way off the target:) 
'course that's before commision... but even than, majority of people were doing well at around $10CAN /hour
Anonymous
February 15, 2001 8:52:14 AM

Where I work, we make $6.50 (american) and about the same or slightly more in commision. So it often works out to about 13-15. I don't complain too much about my wage, but we certainly won't be luring away any NASA engineers!

Tom Mc

Even a fool, when he remains silent, appears wise.<P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1><EM>Edited by TheTominator on 02/15/01 03:56 AM.</EM></FONT></P>
Anonymous
February 16, 2001 11:30:14 AM

Just the mere fact that you would post your juvenile accomplishments at vandalism speakes volumes. I've wasted enough time reading your rubbish.
August 3, 2009 4:51:39 AM

I was doing some work experince for a computer shop.

Someone came in with a computer, which had been overclocked... And too cool it down he had installed a car radiator. I sh!t you not.
It was a full on, radiator which cooled the system using water. And, it had leaked. LOl he asked my boss to fix it, but we couldn't so we had to give him a new computer which was much slower than the one he 'modded' lol.

..
Wow, 2001. Sorry folks. Just searched google for 'dickhead computer' and this thread came up. :) 
August 6, 2009 8:47:28 PM

>>Perhaps I am just unlucky and I meet up with the wrong sales guys all of the time.

Perhaps you went into situations with a bad attitude and a feeling of superiority and the person was an ass to you for a reason. If you go looking for a fight, it's not hard to find one. If you go looking for problems, you find them.

This happens in all industries though. People get pissed at their servers because their food takes a long time and tastes bad even though it's not their fault. People bitch at customer service due to problems that arise due to their own missuse. People yell at hotel workers because their bed is dirty. People yell at the desk worker at the airport because their plane is late.

I find that if you treat people with respect, you generally get respect in return. Sure there are sleezy sales people, but not all sales people are assholes. And compairing engineering to sales is the stupidest thing I've ever heard. You're compairing a job where reutine is the norm to a job where every sale is different and items change daily.
!