Card duz not werk

[truckless]

Can some of you stupid morons help me. My card doesnt work. Im not sure which card it is but its either the graphics card or the video card. I cant tell. Anyway, the computer wont turn on so it must be one of these cards. And dont give me a long answer, i want an answer written with exactly 16 letters. You stupid people dont know anything, please help me.

 

[rumcooler]

Is this bin?

 

[RichPLS]

Sometimes the video cards get diode electrical deficient. Simple to resolve.
Power up machine, and rub the back of the video card with tin foil to remove the contaminents. This also works for your motherboard.
Post your results.


========================
Try everything...
Do not be afraid of failure, for this is how we learn and grow...
Live life to the fullest...
Do not regret what you have not yet done!!!

 

[priyajeet]

LMAO, hope he doesnt see it.

Good u started a new thread for him (r u him ya dearest comrade ?), we hijacked his thread :tongue:

<i> :tongue: <font color=blue>I don't suffer from insanity.</font color=blue><font color=red> I enjoy every minute of it.</font color=red> :tongue: </i>
<b>He who laughs last thinks slowest!</b>

 

[truckless]

I know that what you told me is the right answer, im not stupid, but i'm not going to do it because i said SIXTEEN LETTERS not a million!!! Stupid idiot you dont know anything!!

 

[RichPLS]

U R a Folkin DumbAss!

16-characters...



========================
Try everything...
Do not be afraid of failure, for this is how we learn and grow...
Live life to the fullest...
Do not regret what you have not yet done!!!

 

[fishmahn]

Broke throw it away.

 

[truckless]

RichPLS you need to read this thread if you havent already

<A HREF="http://forumz.tomshardware.com/hardware/modules.php?name=Forums&file=viewtopic&p=412167#412167" target="_new">http://forumz.tomshardware.com/hardware/modules.php?name=Forums&file=viewtopic&p=412167#412167</A>

 

[cleeve]

Tinfoil won't work in all cases, and there is a small chance it will overload the amelic contacts... not worth it, buddy!

I find it's safer to use a palm-sized chunk of granite for scraping away the deficiency remnants from your motherboard.

This has the added benefit of increasing your overclocking potential about 200%, because the granite particulate will assist in electon flow!

And if you <b>REALLY</b> want to fix it good, tie the board to a string and drag it behind your car on a gravel road no less than 62 mph, but no more than 67 mph, for seven minutes.

If you go more than 10 minutes you will begin to do more harm than good to your hardware.
This is the most efficient way of optimizing your system.

________________
<b>Radeon <font color=red>9700 PRO</b></font color=red> <i>(o/c 332/345)</i>
<b>AthlonXP <font color=red>3200+</b></font color=red> <i>(Barton 2500+ o/c 400 FSB)</i>
<b>3dMark03: <font color=red>5,354</b>

 

[priyajeet]

nah, u all dunno anything. its actual cooling issue. open the case side. Unizip ur fly hole, piss on the card. and u ll see it run like hell.

<i> :tongue: <font color=blue>I don't suffer from insanity.</font color=blue><font color=red> I enjoy every minute of it.</font color=red> :tongue: </i>
<b>He who laughs last thinks slowest!</b>

 

[sweatlaserxp]

Maybe not SIXTEEN letters, but I'm sure we can come up with some troubleshooting Haiku if we're bored and geek enough...

Athlon 2500+, Asus A7N8X Deluxe Rev2, 768Mb Corsair XMS 5-2-2-2.5, Sapphire 9800 Pro 128Mb, Seagate SATA 80Gb, Fortron-Source FSP400-60PFN

 

[sweatlaserxp]

<i>I went to Best Buy

6800GT

Was waiting for me</i>

Athlon 2500+, Asus A7N8X Deluxe Rev2, 768Mb Corsair XMS 5-2-2-2.5, Sapphire 9800 Pro 128Mb, Seagate SATA 80Gb, Fortron-Source FSP400-60PFN

 

[truckless]

ROFLMAOPMSL this is even funnier than the original. BUT IM REALLY STUCK!!!! I have tried all of those suggestion even though they are SO long and im really lazy, but none of them has worked. I know my graphics card works better now, because i did the granite thingy, and i can hear it making calculation noises (like that grinding noise your computer makes when it is working really hard) so it must be doing better. Its working so hard that even the fan is making grinding noises, but the damn thing still doesnt work. Oh and pissing on the card worked great too, but it washed away some of the granite pieces, so i will need to do the granite one again to electrolytelise the megflorian antidisestablishmentarianism flux capacitors. See im not stupid, i know all these tricks already.

 

[TheGreatGrapeApe]

Remember if things overheat, submerge them in water. IT works for blacksmiths it'll work for you.

To answer as you requested... perhaps this will fit;

<i>Dunk it in Water</i>

That's 16 characters if you count the spaces.

Sorry for the late reply, I originally wrote a big long reply cause I thought it was 16! letters (20,922,789,888,000). Man did I ever waste a crap load of time on that reply.

But here's some snipits.

I'd also recommend breaking a thermometer and liberally smearing mercury on the back of the PCB, be sure to taste and make sure the Mecury hasn't curdled because that would reduce it's effectiveness and really anything worth doing is worth doing right.

Glad to see you're making some progess though.

Be sure to use the WS temperature probe method to check your system. If the case interior feels hot, try touching your tongue or your peni$ (whichever is sticking out at the time) to the HSF and see if it's cool to the touch. Be sure to wait for maximum load to ensure your test is at maximum efficiency.


- You need a licence to buy a gun, but they'll sell anyone a stamp <i>(or internet account)</i> ! - <font color=green>RED </font color=green> <font color=red> GREEN</font color=red> GA to SK

 

[PukePile]

This is so simple to fix i can't believe you guys haven't fixed this.

Basicly whats happening is your not getting enough voltage to your card.The fix for this is simple.We take ohms law V=IR which means voltage equals I(I as in what you call youself) times Resistance.So to fix it we need to put more I in the equation. So what you should do is take one of your molex connectors and cut it.Next strip and fray the wires you just cut.Next take the wires comeing from the PSU and put it in your mouth then put the wires going to your card and put them up your butt.If that doesnt work just put more of yourself in the equation.If that still doesnt work you need to put more voltage to your PSU so just repeat what i said before with the cord going form your wall to you tower.

If that doesn't fix it then your sh*t out of luck.


<A HREF="http://arc.aquamark3.com/arc/arc_view.php?run=682299587" target="_new">40k in aquamark 3
</A>
P4b2.4@2.8||1024mb DDR@392mhz||9800pro@420/740||Viewsonic UltraBrite 19"||Panisonic DVD-RW

 

[Crashman]

Donate it to me.

<font color=blue>Only a place as big as the internet could be home to a hero as big as Crashman!</font color=blue>
<font color=red>Only a place as big as the internet could be home to an ego as large as Crashman's!</font color=red>

 

[bin]

You all morons, making fun of others only reflects back at you. Shows how bad attitudes morons like you have. Not only you are a disgrace to normal social behavior which people - non freaks, non nerds, non geeks - like me have, you are a disgrace to this forum, where people come on for help, and jerks like you all make fun of. Sorry to say, but you people have no future.

<font color=red> u all suck !!! </font color=red>

 

[PukePile]

Lol "normal social behavior" so normal social behavior is hanging out online telling us how dumb and futureless we are.If you had a so called social life you wouldnt spend your time here bugging us.


<A HREF="http://arc.aquamark3.com/arc/arc_view.php?run=682299587" target="_new">40k in aquamark 3
</A>
P4b2.4@2.8||1024mb DDR@392mhz||9800pro@420/740||Viewsonic UltraBrite 19"||Panisonic DVD-RW

 

[truckless]

HAHAHAHAHA im laughing so much i am in tears Well this has been great fun bin, admittedly at your expense - i dont think i have ever seen such funny threads, but anyway the fact still remains when you are in Rome, you SHOULD do as the Romans do! Dont expect a community to adapt to your rude and ungrateful manner and learn to love it. If we lads (and of course not forgetting the ladettes ) are so useless, leave us to ourselves and wait until we have convinced Bill Gates to go Open Source, and then we will come back and we might have time to take a look at your computer. If you are offended by this, i can only say:

You brought it on yourself. Oh and also, if thats the case, WHY DO YOU COME BACK??

Lol

Regards....

 

[priyajeet]

come on man, dont get sentimental. lets keep enjoying the dumb assholes wit

<i> :tongue: <font color=blue>I don't suffer from insanity.</font color=blue><font color=red> I enjoy every minute of it.</font color=red> :tongue: </i>
<b>He who laughs last thinks slowest!</b>

 

[Mr5oh]

This "special" cable will "fix" your video card, voltage problem.

<A HREF="http://www.fiftythree.org/etherkiller/img/vgakiller.jpg" target="_new">http://www.fiftythree.org/etherkiller/img/vgakiller.jpg</A>

, LOL!

My Desktop: <A HREF="http://Mr5oh.tripod.com/pc.html" target="_new">http://Mr5oh.tripod.com/pc.html</A>

 

[cleeve]

Holy [-peep-] where can I get me one of them cables?

I hear those can instantly add 115 volts to your monitor's output power! But only for a fraction of a second.

________________
<b>Radeon <font color=red>9700 PRO</b></font color=red> <i>(o/c 332/345)</i>
<b>AthlonXP <font color=red>3200+</b></font color=red> <i>(Barton 2500+ o/c 400 FSB)</i>
<b>3dMark03: <font color=red>5,354</b>

 

[priyajeet]

did ur mom drop u on your head, while u were young ???

bcos i feel there are some bricks loose in there !

<i> :tongue: <font color=blue>I don't suffer from insanity.</font color=blue><font color=red> I enjoy every minute of it.</font color=red> :tongue: </i>
<b>He who laughs last thinks slowest!</b>

 

[TeeTewl]

Hi I can fix your card...send it to me. I will fix your card send it to me. Is your card doing this...



Mine is too. Your card is broke send it to me. I can fix it send it to me. Oh yeah while your'e at it eat shite and die.

Gort, Klaatu nicto barada...Patricia Neal

 

[BigMac]

SoDNightHawk, I've found a friend for you! I'm certain you will get along fine with bin here. I'm not completely sure on his grade 8 education but bin loves oneliners and useless help and I am sure that he will take <b>your</b> advice.

Just keep your posts small though because too many letters confuse him.


BigMac

<A HREF="http://www.p3int.com/product_center_NWO_The_Story.asp" target="_new">New World Order</A>