Ah, I am starting to understand.
First off it seems (unintentionally I'm sure) that you are grouping all RAM into "DDR" where there are currently 3 very different technologies and soon to be a 4th.
I will try to answer your question using the current generation of RAM, DDR3.
The default speed of RAM is actually linked to the CPU. First and second Gen i series intel ran by default at 1333MHz, 3rd gen i series runs by default at 1600MHz. The MB sets these speeds, depending on other hardware.
This is why I can go out right now and buy a 2400MHz RAM kit, and drop it in a Sandy Bridge (second Gen i5) boot it up, and it will be running at 1333MHz. In order to increase it to the rated specs we need to OC it, which is easy now that XMP profiles are included that have all the settings. You just choose which one you want.