Do you know a clean joke?

[kyle arn]

What are the best the funniest CLEAN jokes ever.

 

[JackNaylorPE]

Why do most men die before their wives ?

Spoiler

Cause they want to

 

[benjii]

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea.

What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea.

That's all I know!

 

[quilciri]

Oh, you meant clean as in safe for work... so you probably don't want to hear the one about the hooker and the carwash.

 

[DarkSable]

What's the difference between an introverted engineer and an extroverted one?

The extroverted engineer stares at your shoes,

 

[Supermuncher85]

How do you get a pikachu on a train?

Spoiler

You Pokém-on

What does Bruce Lee order at Burger king?

Spoiler

Whoppa!

 

[Mousemonkey]

What's the difference between an airline pilot and God? God doesn't think he's a pilot.

 

[benjii]

What's the difference between an introverted engineer and an extroverted one?

The extroverted engineer stares at your shoes,

 

[quilciri]

A sergeant in motion outranks a lieutenant that doesn't know what's going on.

An ordnance tech at a dead run outranks everybody.

- schlock mercenaries

 

[mapesdhs]

Why are men like noodles? Because they're always in hot water, lack taste and they need dough.

How does one get a man to exercise? Put the remote between his toes.

What's the difference between government Bonds and men? Government Bonds mature.


Can't remember the rest. Had a whole list... put a 7/11 store of female staff into hysterics
with them all. Male manager came out, asked what was going on, they looked at him and
then just started laughing even more.

Of course if you want to come at it from the other side of the fence, then...

What do you call 10 blondes in a row? A wind tunnel.

Ian.

 

[maddogfargo]

I went to see my therapist and he said my problem fitting in socially was I'm an angry jerk to people.

I said he was the dumbest, most incompetent person I know and I demanded a 2nd opinion.

So he said "OK, you're ugly too!"

 

[ssddx]

while me and another coworker were engaging in some rather techy geek talks my boss 8-10 years ago came up with a witty phrase to say. it honestly had me laughing (its not funny unless you're techie) but my coworker didnt seem to get it.

"oh yeah... well my gigahertz when i ram is that a problem?"

 

[kyle arn]

LOL

 

[mpjesse]

Why are fish terrible at basketball?

Because they're afraid of the net.