Dear Microsoft. (Jan 18 / 2014)
I am offering to be the CEO of your company, which you should consider quite serious as many other high profile possibilities have refused to be the leader of your company. You need new blood, with a different mind set than the current 30+ year old culture. One of the advantages I give to lead the Microsoft company is that I actually do not like the company itself nor many of your products due to your business tactics, lack of originality, middle management idiots and very little creativity. Considering the wealth the company has, it is quite clear that you cannot buy the talent you need because people DON'T want to work for you.
I have out-dated patents from 2001 that are more hip than any iMac, ever. Sure, I do not make millions per year, but guess what? Bill Gates, Steve jobs, Richard Branson and others started their companies with a few dollars, a garage and vision. Microsoft no longer has a face or personality, even thou Bill Gates was always considered the "GEEK", he does have personality and compassion. As of now, Microsoft has ZERO personality other than middle-management yuppies. Look at the CEO of Virgin (Branson), he never graduated from high school but runs one of the most successful and well liked companies in the world, I mean the DUDE HAS A FLEET SPACE CRAFT and gives nude babe Kite-surf rides!!!
I have been very public on many ways to correct the Windows 8 OS, long before it was released to the retail market. The fact that YOUR entire board and management thought that Windows 8 was going to be a knockout proves your lack of leadership, common sense and creativity... over all, just plain stupid. Everything that has happened with Windows 8 and 8.1, Surface, WP8 and WinRT, I had predicted.
I think its funny as hell that Microsoft expected Windows 8.1 to jump-start the Windows-PC market... when instead, Windows 7 market share grew!! So here is my offer: Give me two years to ACTUALLY change the company for the future. Stop being the copy-cat company with no direction other than driving the company into a mountain face that has a painting of a tunnel drawn by Bugs Bunny. I'll work on the cheap, $2 million a year + expenses. If the company isn't growing or improving public opinion and sales, then I'll be gone, no golden parachute required. If I make the company better, I get bonuses that are deserved and continue on as your CEO.
I am available to start work now.
Seriously... Trust me, you have nothing to lose by hiring me.
And think of the publicity.
Send me a PM on Tomshardware.
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