Away for the day..[sniff] - Page 2

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Am I going to be in trouble?

Look, I'm not saying that Angel is fat. It's just that she has more Chins than the Hong Kong phone book.

Wingding - the strongest argument yet for genetic screening

Your fate is inevitable.

<pre>c'mon, let's here some more.</pre><p><font color=blue>"When you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get." - Homer Simpson.</font color=blue>

You know...it's not every day you get to see an Irish pervert decapitated by a flying flip-flop.

...*Sitting up straight and waiting for the grand finale*...

<b><font color=blue>~ <A HREF="http://forums.btvillarin.com/index.php?act=ST&f=41&t=324&s=58e94ba84a16bedfebbf0f416d5bac48" target="_new">System Specs</A> ~<font color=blue></b>

Actually, as it's an Aussie flip-flop, it's also part boomerang.

...*Rings gravediggers and undertakers in advance*...

<font color=blue>"When you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get." - Homer Simpson.</font color=blue>

Enoughs enough wingding!

<b><font color=purple>51% Angel, 49% Bitch...DON'T push it!</font color=purple></b>

You'll never learn!

<b><font color=purple>51% Angel, 49% Bitch...DON'T push it!</font color=purple></b>

[cough]BULLSHITE![/cough]

<b><font color=purple>51% Angel, 49% Bitch...DON'T push it!</font color=purple></b>

Red Alert! Everyone inside the atom bunkers... serious warning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My CPU fan spins so fast that it creates a wormhole

Morning here.
Gotta get ready for work now!

<b><font color=purple>51% Angel, 49% Bitch...DON'T push it!</font color=purple></b>

Can I help it I live iin another continent and work or sleep when all you guys post?

My CPU fan spins so fast that it creates a wormhole

You don't read the threads in flat mode do you?
Must be why you would often be led to think you were following a recent post thread.
And no it's really not about time, I mean I come in the morning when you must be posting on the other side and Wingding, so really, everyone loses sometimes here.
Honestly I've never caught RobD and Wingding's conversations live, they are always done by the time I check in.
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If I could see the Matrix, I'd tell you I am only seeing 0s inside your head! <P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1><EM>Edited by Eden on 06/25/03 05:55 PM.</EM></FONT></P>

I used to be annoyed by that as well, until I found (more like remembered) the Thread mode switch. On the top right of your post layout, there is a button to switch to thread mode (it's on the range of buttons like back and forward). Then you can find what he is saying.

Back then I told him several times to start quoting, but alas I can't make him do that in this forum, rather I am guessing he uses Thread Mode so I just switch to see what he was replying to.
Indeed the most common NEW TAG thread flood is when he returns and catches up. Often one new post.

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If I could see the Matrix, I'd tell you I am only seeing 0s inside your head!

Lately, for a couple weeks or so, I've just ignored Svol's posts. Not to be mean or anything, but he's been about 14 hours late in every thread. Sometimes more. It's just a waste of my time to read his posts when he's so late. It's just not funny by the time he gets here.

<A HREF="http://forums.btvillarin.com/index.php?act=ST&f=41&t=389&s=1fee5dab901bebe29da7aa1c2658fc6f" target="_new"><font color=red>dhlucke's system</font color=red></A>

<font color=blue>GOD</font color=blue> <font color=red>BLESS</font color=red> <font color=blue>AMERICA</font color=blue>

I'd have to agree.
But I still read what he says, hoping he CAN make sense of what he is replying to.

And I thought I was the only one who had a problem here with his type of posting sometimes.

--
If I could see the Matrix, I'd tell you I am only seeing 0s inside your head!

It'll probably be in the Fiction section.

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<font color=blue>War</font color=blue> <font color=orange>Eagle</font color=orange>

I found this over at Craigslist.

Svol should take these pointers into consideration.

Dear Soon to be Ex:

Its been 3 months we’ve been together and things just aren’t working out that well for me. I was planning to tell you this tomorrow night but since you just cancelled our date to watch the playoffs I thought [-peep-] it, I’m doing it by CL. Here’s the deal. You’re generally a decent guy and hopefully you’ll meet the right woman one day. And when you do, I hope that either she’s frigid or you learn to [-peep-] her better than you’ve ever [-peep-] me. Thus, in the interest of your future happiness, I thought I’d pass along some tips. God knows I’ve tried to tell you and show you all of this in a number of ways, but in a way that wouldn’t damage that tender ego of yours. However, the time for diplomacy has ended.

Okay, here we go. First of all: Fore play. Say it with me now, FOREPLAY. that’s right two syllables. Fore and Play. Breaking it down into its constituent components, what do we get? Fore—which suggests prior, or previous and play, which suggests pleasure. Okay, so, how do we do this “playing before” thing? You seem to like rubbing me, which in and of itself is not a bad thing. But rubbing my head ain’t gonna get me anywhere. Hell, I get that when I get my hair washed and cut and while it feels pretty good, it doesn’t make me want to do the nasty with my lovely (but utterly gay) hairdresser (something for which he is, no doubt, profoundly grateful). Why not start with a little kissing, and no, that doesn’t mean sloppily licking my lips like I’m some kind of damn ice cream cone (hold the licking for later, or, rather, lower). Maybe a trail of soft kisses on the back of my neck and a few nibbles on my ears, huh? I’ve told you like 700 times how much I love that. Then as you slowly return your lips to mine, the tongue can be released from its cage. Not lashing out like some kind of whip, but a sweet, smooth little tease.

Okay, so we’ve got some kissing going. Let’s talk about the next step: Undressing. When you take a girl’s bra off, you need to unsnap it. If you are having trouble, its okay to ask for help. But its not okay to simply shove the thing up. Not only does it practically choke me, but it stretches out the elastic and I personally don’t feel like spending 30 bucks on a bra simply because you can’t figure out a little hook and eye. Plus, its sexy when you undress someone. So do it with grace and pleasure. And don’t just take it all off me at once and leave me lying there naked while you proceed to take your clothes off (and you also don’t need to spend 5 minutes folding your shirt and rolling your socks in a ball while I’m waiting for some lovin’). Intersperse the removal of clothing with some kisses and licks—this is not a strip search after all.

Now, for the breasts. They are not, I repeat, not, dials on a radio. Nipples may get hard when you tweak and twist them, but it is not because of pleasure. No my friend, try some gentle sucking for a change. Oh yeah, and don’t forget to give them equal treatment. For some reason, leftie seems to be the only one getting any action from you. Not that its giving rightie anything to be jealous of, but still……Oh, and when a girl says “Ouch!” it usually doesn’t mean, “please twist my nipples harder.”

Okay, if you’ve been following my suggestions so far, foreplay should be moving into high gear. But this does not mean its time to push her mouth onto your dick. If she wants to do that, she will. Or you can ask nicely..But with you, once the cock is sucked, the game is pretty much over, so you might want to try a few other things first…like: Take mouth off breast, move mouth south to between legs, part legs, find clitoris, lick/suck/nibble until you hear moans of pleasure (do establish its pleasure…again, “ouch” does not mean “oohhh.”) And, if you hear moans, then whatever you do, DON’T STOP until asked.

Now, I’ve been a bit puzzled as to why you seem to consistenly skip this all important step between the breast tweaking and hairy meeting sally. Perhaps it Is due to some kind of weird fears? Let me reassure you, women tend to shower daily, they’ll let you know if Aunt Flo is visiting, and there are no teeth (or any other sharp objects) down there.

Okay, so now we should be in pretty good shape. It might be time for some unscripted moves (like she might give you the best damn head you’ve ever had, and if she does its okay to talk to her but telling her to “take it ALL in baby” and then ramming your cock down her throat is NOT going to do anything to the anatomical structure of her throat so you might as well keep quiet).

Alright, for the sake of brevity, let’s say the curtain has risen and its time for the last act. (Note: one way to establish readiness is by touch. If she’s dry as the Sahara desert, I suggest you go back to step 3, or even 2). Assuming all systems go, I want you to use your creativity. While I’m sure she wouldn’t mind if you’re flopped on top of her, all 180 lbs plastered against her undoubtedly sore nipples while you pound away, you might try sitting up for a change, pulling her hips into yours, letting her ride you, flipping her over (spanking optional), [-peep-] her against the bathroom sink? Why don’t you try establishing a rhythm with her consciously slowing when you need to, rather than just “going going gone?” And if she happens to reach down to caress your balls and maybe massage your prostrate, just relax man. She’s not going to penetrate your sacred space (unless of course you ask her to) Oh, and do her the favor of letting her know if you decide that you want to come on her rather than in her. Its not that she’ll mind, but a sudden blast o’sperm in the eyes when one is least expecting it can be rather unsettling.

And finally,until these suggestions have been successfully implemented for at least 6 months, don’t ask whether it was “any good” unless you a) like being lied to or b) have an unbreakable ego.

Well, that’s about it. Good luck with your (sex) life.


<font color=red><i>Doctor Hooter</i></font color=red> <A HREF="http://www.page3.com/" target="_new"><b>(·Y·)</b></A>

I actually got chubber reading it the first time.
She seems to be prime Wingding/RobD material.

<font color=red><i>Doctor Hooter</i></font color=red> <A HREF="http://www.page3.com/" target="_new"><b>(·Y·)</b></A>

Good stuff. I doubt the hookers over there are that picky, but hey....

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<font color=blue>War</font color=blue> <font color=orange>Eagle</font color=orange>

You did read what me, Auburn and DH said about that kind of posting?

--
If I could see the Matrix, I'd tell you I am only seeing 0s inside your head!

It CAN'T be more!

--
If I could see the Matrix, I'd tell you I am only seeing 0s inside your head!

I hear that 2.0 and 2.0+ have a virus that makes their head swell.

<A HREF="http://forums.btvillarin.com/index.php?act=ST&f=41&t=389&s=1fee5dab901bebe29da7aa1c2658fc6f" target="_new"><font color=red>dhlucke's system</font color=red></A>

<font color=blue>GOD</font color=blue> <font color=red>BLESS</font color=red> <font color=blue>AMERICA</font color=blue>