Free Beer - Page 3

FREE BEER

An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Scot were sitting in a bar. The view was
fantastic, the beer excellent, and the food exceptional.

"Y'know" said the Scot, "I still prefer the pubs back home. Why in Glasgow
there's a little bar called McTavish's where the owner will buy your 5th
drink after you buy 4."

"Well" said the Englishman, "at my local, the Red Lion, the barman there
will buy your 3rd drink after you buy the first 2."

"Ahhh that's nothing" said the Irishman. "Back home in Dublin there's Ryan's
bar. Now the moment you set foot in the place they'll buy you a drink, then
another, all the drinks you like. Then when you've had enough they'll take
you upstairs and see that you get laid. All on the house."

The Englishman and the Scot immediately pour scorn on the Irishman's claims.
He swears every word is true.

"Well" said the Englishman, "did this actually happen to you?"

"No, not me personally," said the Irishman.
"But it did happen to me sister."

I got a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend of mine the other day. We lost track of time, chatting about the wild nights we used to enjoy together.
I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd like to meet up and maybe rekindle a little of that magic.
"Wow!", I said, "I don't know if I could keep pace with you now!
I'm a bit older and a bit balder than when you last saw me!"
She giggled and said she was sure I'd meet the challenge!
"Yeah", I said, "just so long as you don't mind a man with a waistband that's a few inches wider these days!"
She laughed and told me to stop being so silly!
She teased me, saying that she thought tubby bald men were cute!
"Anyway", "I've put on a couple of pounds myself!" she giggled...





...so I told her to f*ck off