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''Privates'' for PC Gets Enhanced Without Drugs

By - Source: Tom's Hardware US | B 14 comments
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Here's a PC game that will leave you speechless.

Earlier this year Zombie Cow Studios announced Privates, a side-scrolling action PC game that takes place in feminine areas where the sun don't shine. The game became available back in August, however the Xbox 360 version was canned because of its questionable content. Now the company has revealed a free DLC pack for the PC version slated for Spring 2011, offering additional gameplay within the male anatomy.

"We’ve decided to go all-out and make a whole new adventure, this time set inside a gentleman’s bits," said Dan Marshall from Zombie Cow Studios. "We’re also planning to cram in new gameplay mechanics, new enemy types, new locations, and a new player character. It’s not just more of the same, although it’s DLC so clearly some of it’s going to wind up pretty similar."

The unique premise behind Privates is both humorous and somewhat embarrassing. Players lead a "teenty-tiny" gang of condom-hatted marines into private parts as they blast away various microscopic monsters. The game consists of five levels full of 3D rendered human anatomy, a fully-voiced comedy script, and a "nutso" soundtrack.

"You never know, you might even learn something handy about your downstairs-department," the company mused.

Zombie Cow added that the anatomy aspect isn't biologically accurate, so no worries about a forced lesson in biology. "We've had to make loads of concessions in order to make the game fun to play," the developer said. "There's still loads of important stuff to take from Privates. Just be sensible about which bits."

Privates is free to download and explore, and can be accessed here. As previously mentioned, the DLC pack is expected to become available in Spring 2011--Viagra and Extenze not needed for gameplay.

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Top Comments
  • 18 Hide
    house70 , November 2, 2010 12:38 AM
    "the anatomy aspect isn't biologically accurate"...
    I guess that's why the company said "you might even learn something HANDY"...lol

    But, seriously...what's the point of this? just pure fun.
  • 15 Hide
    bebangs , November 2, 2010 3:39 AM
    Violent/Gory games - Ok?
    Cartoonish and Not-so-"Sexy" game = Banned?


  • 12 Hide
    AMW1011 , November 2, 2010 1:42 AM
    house70"the anatomy aspect isn't biologically accurate"...I guess that's why the company said "you might even learn something HANDY"...lolBut, seriously...what's the point of this? just pure fun.


    Kinda like video games in general.
Other Comments
    Display all 14 comments.
  • 18 Hide
    house70 , November 2, 2010 12:38 AM
    "the anatomy aspect isn't biologically accurate"...
    I guess that's why the company said "you might even learn something HANDY"...lol

    But, seriously...what's the point of this? just pure fun.
  • 12 Hide
    AMW1011 , November 2, 2010 1:42 AM
    house70"the anatomy aspect isn't biologically accurate"...I guess that's why the company said "you might even learn something HANDY"...lolBut, seriously...what's the point of this? just pure fun.


    Kinda like video games in general.
  • 4 Hide
    mavroxur , November 2, 2010 1:44 AM
    Just.... LOL!
  • 2 Hide
    dEAne , November 2, 2010 2:43 AM
    it is quite funny game.
  • 4 Hide
    rohitbaran , November 2, 2010 2:51 AM
    Bet Steve jobs wouldn't allow this one on iCrap.
  • 15 Hide
    bebangs , November 2, 2010 3:39 AM
    Violent/Gory games - Ok?
    Cartoonish and Not-so-"Sexy" game = Banned?


  • 4 Hide
    johnny_5 , November 2, 2010 6:04 AM
    greghomeIs there gonna be a DLC where u play as a sperm and races with the other sperms to the egg ?

    Victory is mine!
  • 1 Hide
    Anonymous , November 2, 2010 6:52 AM
    The game is actually pretty decent and semi educational. Should be part of sex class in high schools.
  • 5 Hide
    ddragoonss , November 2, 2010 10:21 AM
    Quote:
    Violent/Gory games - Ok?
    Cartoonish and Not-so-"Sexy" game = Banned?


    Welcome to the United States of America!!!
  • 1 Hide
    back_by_demand , November 2, 2010 10:38 AM
    greghomeIs there gonna be a DLC where u play as a sperm and races with the other sperms to the egg ?

    That would be fantastic, a bit like Pod Racing crossed with stunts on Flat Out 2
  • 1 Hide
    HavoCnMe , November 2, 2010 12:43 PM
    I will play it just for laughs. This is how they should teach kids about unprotected sex. JMO
  • 1 Hide
    kelemvor4 , November 2, 2010 12:59 PM
    greghomeIs there gonna be a DLC where u play as a sperm and races with the other sperms to the egg ?

    It will be an online multiplayer racing sim.
  • 1 Hide
    back_by_demand , November 2, 2010 2:13 PM
    kelemvor4It will be an online multiplayer racing sim.

    With millions of players
  • 0 Hide
    killme , November 3, 2010 6:34 PM
    Kill me, don't sex me!