Jimmy Kimmel Mocks the iPad Mini, Other Apple Products

On his talk show last week, Jimmy Kimmel expressed his dissatisfaction with Apple's iPad Mini, with the tablet touted as a a bigger iPod you can't talk on.

He told the audience that for the millions of consumers who have yet to regain power due to Hurricane Sandy, Apple is releasing a new "paperweight" with the mini tablet.

Due to the storm, Kimmel said customers in New York or New Jersey who stands in line for an iPad Mini this weekend should be "punched in the throat." Those who have that sort of time should consider volunteering, he stressed.

"First came the iPod, then a slightly thinner iPod, then a tinier iPod, then a taller, thinner iPod, then a taller, thinner iPod that shuffles your songs, then a pink one, a blue one, a green one, then an even smaller iPod, then a wider iPod," he said in an Apple promo spoof.

"[After those, came] an iPod you can touch, then an iPod you can talk on, then an iPod you can talk on with a G on it, then a shorter, fatter iPod, then a shorter, fatter iPod that shuffles, then a thinner iPod you can talk on with a 4 on it, then a gigantic iPod you cannot talk on, then a gigantic iPod you cannot talk on that's a little faster, then a white one, then a taller, thinner iPod you can talk on, and now a bigger but not gigantic iPod you cannot talk on."

In closing, the promo told consumers not to forget to purchase the charger for the new Lightning connector.

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  • nameon

    Jimmy Kimmel is now my hero!!!
  • Priox
    I've always loved Jimmy Kimmel. Love him even more now.

    Mors ad pomum
  • phatboe
    Apple sucks \THREAD
  • DRosencraft
    Love or hate Apple, that is downright the funniest bit I have seen in a very long time. Absolutely priceless!
  • epaalx
    Different products (edit: made at different time) for different users with different needs. Where's the funny?
    Can make same (edit: historical) summary about Ford's range - all have wheels but some are small, some large, some skinny, some wide, etc, etc.
  • jaquith
    Funny, but Kimmel sucks, no iSucks!
  • house70
    OMG, OMG, OMG, a white one!!!!

    LOL at iSuckers.
  • deftonian
    I really don't like Kimmel or Apple but it's always nice to see two things you don't like clash. I'll be team Kimmel on this one because he's the lesser of two douches.
  • eklipz330
    i think those were cheap shots for the most part. im not an apple fan, and i dont like their closed system with little to no customization. that's the reason i don't like apple products. i do think they look fantastic, and when it comes to performance, they have the best mobile devices according to benchmarks . too bad you can't do much with the performance, especially on their laptops and desktops.

    i think any other reason is borderline fanboyish. you can argue that theyre a bad company with bad morals and blah blah, but the bottom line is, 98% of the corporations out there do exactly that. and you buy from those companies anyway. apple just mastered profiting from it. i bet google does some skeptical stuff too. even if they dont, they still buy chips from samsung, which is king of evil. don't even get me started on the precious gems market, and oil as well. apple is the lesser of evils, and theyre just in the spotlight, which grants them more haters. unfortunate for them.

    end rant.
  • killerclick
    This guy is going to get cancelled. Apple is the most valuable company in the world, and I'm not sure they'll tolerate some late-night clown shitting on their products.