Caption Contest: Happy Birthday, Steve Ballmer!
We haven't done a Steve Ballmer caption contest yet, but it was his birthday yesterday so we figure it's high time we show the CEO of Microsoft a little love.
I tried to find a picture of Steve with a cake or a birthday hat, you know, because it's his birthday and all. Unfortunately the closest thing I could get was Bill Gates covered in pie, so I settled for just Steve looking really, really happy. This is the happiest picture I could find. Caption away, my little darlings!
Here are the top ten from last week's post:
Schmidt: "On display today is Mr. Jobs! Who somehow has managed to make millions and millions of dollars all while wearing the same set of clothes for the past 5 years. It's just incredible!"
Eric: " And here to my right, we have the devil himself. Because only the devil can convince so many people to buy overpriced hardware with heavily limited OSes."
Steve: "Awww, why thank you Eric. It's funny how many people don't notice my logo is actually the forbidden fruit from the Garden of Eve."
Steve - "You aren't still upset about being booted from the Apple board are you?"
Eric - "Not really, in fact I'm in such a good mood I just told all of China that their leaders murdered protestors 21 years ago in Tiananmen Square"
Eric: I hold in my hands every innovation Apple has made over the last 10 years!
Steve: There's a truck out back filled with the patents for all of that innovation!
Eric: How about a Hug?
Jobs: Let me patent myself first...
Steve: I am a mac
Eric: I am an Android.
Eric: "Why hello Steve, lets be friends!"
Steve: "Do Not Want!"
Eric - "Ladies and gentleman! I give you the visionary of 'magical' devices, such as the iPad, Mr. Steve Jobs! I believe he is the only man who has surpassed the great David Copperfield in Magic and Illusion!"
Steve - "Why Thank you Eric...hey! Wait a minute..."


Secondly
Ballmer: Microsoft's new virtual sex-mo-tron works perfectly!
Pimp in Middle: Yo homie, this virtual lovin' is gonna cost you!
Girl: OMG virtual Steve Ballmer has his tentacles EVERYWHERE!
random Asian guy: "Bend over and tell that to my West Siiiiiiied Shocker!"
Really, why is that guy putting up the "shocker?"
[Steve Ballmer - said through teeth] Stop making me smile you bastard! SOMEBODY HELP.
[Asian lady] This is kind of kinky. XD
Unless your GF is opposite of most women.
Offstage reply: "Sure!"
Ballmer: "Sweet!"